The Sacred Child


Says Matthew Fox, in “Original blessing:” ”The divine and the demonic are very close together, only a thin line separates them/us. We who are indeed capable of divinity are also capable of the demonic.”

It is soon Christmas – I would like to share this story from my book,”When fear comes home to Love.”

The birth of The Holy Child threatened the kingdom of Herod .The Christed Self within us all threatens the reign of our inner ”Herod”, the ego.

At Winter Solstice, many years ago, I gathered a group of students to celebrate the newborn light. In my healing-room, I had created an altar on the floor: a deep blue rectangular cloth sprinkled with small golden foil-stars. An angel guards each corner. In the center a tall alter-candle, surrounded by a wreath of stars in silver and violet. When the group-members take their places, only three figures are present on the cloth: a Shepard with his long staff and a little lamb – and an angel who has called him to follow the star leading to the Child.

I present the Shepard as an image of man in harmony with nature and animals – man living and acting from instinct and heart, from a deeply felt interdependence with life. Our authentic Self.

Now I present the rest of the figurines belonging to the Christmas-mystery, one by one: ”please notice, inside yourself, how these characters live and are part of you – and which qualities they bring to the sacred event: Joseph…protective, fatherly, faithful. Deeply accepting his role as the head of his family and serving God. Never questioning his destiny. Mary…the motherly, nourishing…grace…innocence, willingness to serve. Her silent ecstasy by being the Chosen One to carry forth the Child and the new consciousness on earth. Through the Divine Feminine incarnates the Holy Child.

And now the animals…we sense them inside us: the motherly and faithful cows. The sheep, the lambs, the bull and the ass – they are all present when Truth is born. There are no false borders between the true humane and the animals.”

And now I place the tiny Jesus-figure in the crib: the pure love, the total trust, the one heart who embraces all. The joy, the innocence – the Sacred.

We are sitting in the circle in an atmosphere of unfathomable peace and SPACE. A Voice in me asks us to enter meditatively the stable where the Child is lying in the crib, and BE there with all our senses..

When I approach the stable, I am filled by breathless expectation. Time does not exist. The moment is eternal. The stable is so small – and so infinite in extension.(Space?) There is nowhere in the universe that this stable is not.

I hear small small sounds. They create a musical image: the creaking of the straw. The smack of the tails. A deep sigh. I smell the comforting smell of warm cow-bellies and fresh milk. I AM HERE. THIS HAPPENS NOW.

The Holy Child is lying naked in the crib. This clear brow! His eyes are open, peaceful. I have never in this body met such a look. His eyes are reflecting Heaven – I feel that all these eyes fall upon, must melt in love. I know beyond all doubt that this child is safe in the dragon’s den, he can meet the horror beyond all horrors – and all that is seemingly dark will yield and melt before this look: all disguises falling away, all illusions fading. These eyes can only see truth. See the essence behind the monster-mask and the dragon-hide.

I am filled with a burning wish to learn to see with the Child’s eyes – and I give this wish to the Child.

*

A couple of nights after this, my wish is fulfilled.

I awake at night, captured within an insane and destructive energy. I am mortally afraid. ”This time I am done for!” says fear. Further and further inward through the dark hellish caves,, then downwards through yet more abominable depths of horror. The visions are unfathomable gruesome.

Then I remember The Holy Child.

In that very moment I have Him in my arms, and see with His eyes. My heart and lungs expand, all is filled with light, all that is monstrous is melting in light, there exists nothing else but this light. Everything else is unreal, created by our own fear. I AM FREE. I know Who I am. He and I are one.

An unbounded relief and gratefulness fills me to the brim. Warm tears flow warmly and dissolve the fear and agony the muscles have contained. Everything these eyes look upon dissolves and reveals their true essence, which is love.

But living in the world and in the body has a way of letting you forget what you see for real. A couple of years later I sit in meditation in one of Denise Linn’s seminars – about to meet our main inner guiding principle. I am on the shore of a crescent beach, the sand is smooth and golden, the sun is caressing me. I am looking out toward the horizon: a vessel is gliding toward me. I can only glimpse its outline, the sun is so bright. – Now I see it is a shell – like the shell in the painting ”Primavera” by Botticelli. The inside is pale pink shimmering mother-of-pearl, with a rim of shining white! Like a halo. In the shell is my guide: it is the Holy Child! He sits like a little pink Buddha, laughing, holding a shiny, radiant transparent golden ball. It is made of light, but still seems to be material. The shell is sliding softly onto the sand, and he is holding the ball out to me: ”This is yours.”

I recall with a stabbing pain in my heart that I so often have failed to receive this Child . I have seen Him often, but told myself it is only imagination – or convinced myself that I am unworthy. The Child is not judging me. He is not reproaching me. I do not have to confess my sins and regret to win his love. ”Remember Who you are!” He says. ”You and I are One!”

I will never forget.”

You will forget again and again. And beyond time and space I am in reality always here and now. There exists nothing else but this now, and only fear takes you out of it. The fear is not real. I am.”

 

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Please note that nothing written here is intended as medical advice. Readers who think that they need help with a physical or psychological condition are advised to seek a qualified opinion.

%d bloggers like this: