looking from above: I see only the past


High above me in the air, there is a red Zeppelin with a red casket – my daughter  is flying it, and is landing in grace and utmost elegant control.

As she is leaving it,I am entering the casket and let go –  but as I am flying upwards close to a steep mountain, I am all the time very close to the ground.  Halfway up, I make a stop, and witness the most loving and gracious man who takes care of a young crazy-looking boy – he treats him with patience and kindness. I love this man! I look at the ground where I started my balloon-trip: I see a mammoth down there, staggering erratically around  with a cloth over its head, it has lost control and is dangerous. I ask the man if it is possibly to get a taxi down there(which can save me from the mammoth by driving faster than the big animal) – but he answers that there is no taxi-trafic down there yet, it is a construction-ground.

When I wake up I remember that yesterday I told a friend that practicing the Sedona-method makes my body feel like it is under construction – loosening the very structure of the bones – and sensing this as a mirror of the de-construction of the past in my mind.

Maybe I am showed an age-old part of the mind – the mammoth-era -and that it has to do with the construction of my root-chakra. The red balloon is another symbol for that chakra, and I am looking from above, together with Jesus. I think I am revisiting the horror of the first incarnations down here in fragile bodies as humans -(and also this incarnation) and that I am shown that I am safe looking from above.

I see only the past…and some hours later, there is a message on my answering machine: an former boyfriend -24 years ago -is nearby and wants to come visit. My past is visiting me!

This turns out to be a big positive surprise. He is in fact changing my view of our relationship: he’s telling me he was crushed when he met me, and our relationship saved him and restored him to sanity. He is telling me again and again how grateful he is for what I did – and my jaw is hanging down: this is a BIG surprise. And slowly I sense like a veil is being removed, I can take in what he is saying and see with new eyes on my role in that relationship: my perception of a frightened and bothersome person is changed, and I see myself as he sees me: with Love.


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Please note that nothing written here is intended as medical advice. Readers who think that they need help with a physical or psychological condition are advised to seek a qualified opinion.

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