Habemus Papam

This must be the Course In Miracles- movie. Each and every scene I could witness the world and the drama of specialness played out: the Son of God being elected to serve – and fleeing from his true God-given identity, the authority it brings – and all the responsibility.


The cardinals and their expressions during the voting process—silently praying “not me,God, not me! Don’t choose me!”

The Pope is chosen – and flees and hides in Rome.

A high bureaucrat stages a grand lie, to appease the cardinals: he pretends the Pope is hiding/resting from shock/in his room – “you can see his shadow on the curtains.” He has – ;;;giggles::: – instructed a guy from the Swiss Life Guard to impersonate the Pope: walk buy the curtained windows – and even ruffling the  heavy curtains, as a way of “waving” to the cardinals. This ” Pope-shadow” has 3 grand days behind the curtains – chocolate bonbons each morning, putting on His Holiness’s robes – and playing his favorite music on the loudspeakers in the Vatican.

The very best-psychiatrist in Rome is called in – is too nosy – and Pope is taken incognito to the shrink’s separated wife(“the next best in Rome”). She tells him that he is nourishment-challenged, and did not receive a good enough mothering.

WONDERFUL scene where she asks him what his occupation is: “I am an actor” he tells her – and disappears into Rome’s chaos – ending up on a rehearsal of “the Seagull” by Chekhov. There is an insane actor there who runs around and yells that he’ll go insane if he does not get Nina!

Ego/insanity must have a “Nina”  to exist. Without the idea of separation, no insanity.

This line is part of the rehearsal – and the actor is truly insane.

Another time, there is night, and we hear all the cardinals in their rooms (nobody is allowed to leave the Vatican until the Pope is found 🙂 they are praying and crying, and an old cardinal cries loudly for his mama. In the exact second he yells this, my automatic wake-up-caller in my purse goes off. People around me check their cell-phones. But I am graced with the reminder of how much I need to forgive my need for mama – and sweetness embraces me.

As the Pope roams the corridors in the beginning, we see – from above – the darkened St.Peter’s Place where thousands of devout Catholics roam around, waiting for a decision -just like the scared and non-willing Pope. Oh the myriad of details in this movie. There is even a scene where the high decision makers sit in their office with tiny plastic figurines and move them around, while we see a huge panorama of Rome from above.

The psychiatrist reads the Bible to the cardinals at mealtimes, and points out how the Bible speaks about depression and suicidal thoughts in certain places. The cardinals protest at this interpretation. He also teaches them to play cards, and splits them up in Nations – and ends up arranging a volleyball-competition between the different nationalities of cardinals. World politics played out as a volley ball game is hilarious. I won’t tell you who is winning (Oceania.)

If I would see only one film in my life, it would be this. Each tiny detail is demonstrating our belief in the world and specialness, and our fear of our true identity. And it is done with exquisite Love. And the tenderest fun.

When the movie is over, I am walking to the Mall close by – and the revolving doors to the Mall are hardly moving. I am inside the carousel with a man; we both push the door to make it move. It does not budge. We look at each other and laugh: “This is a sign to just slow down.”

And so I am reminded of the revolving-door-image each and every time I start to rush again – flying from my Self, just like the Papa fled.

And I choose again.

1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Mona Gustafson Affinito
    Nov 09, 2011 @ 17:39:19

    Sounds like a must see!


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Please note that nothing written here is intended as medical advice. Readers who think that they need help with a physical or psychological condition are advised to seek a qualified opinion.

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