The story about “evil” transforms

Wonderful gift today form a completely unexpected source.Wow did it blast some old stories and beliefs.

Since my childhood and youth was filled with psychoses and very real-seeming visits from darkness, I learned to believe that anybody who is interested in that stuff must necessarily be lovers of evil.

Now I have uploaded a book at Authonomy – a website for authors – and just joined a game with 63 others where we would read two books each and choose a winner among them -and we would repeat this in 4 finals until we had a winner. The administrator of the thread himself had a book about Lucifer, but he came through as witty and spirited and caring. This puzzled me a lot: did not fit my old story at all.

So I realized that with great  probability I would end up reviewing books about horror or violence – and I mailed the administrator and told him I could not do it, as the stuff in the books was too much related to my earlier psychosis.

The mail I got back was a wonder of grace and love. He presented my withdrawal from the game in the thread with enormous tact and beauty, not giving me away at all, and thanked me several times for sharing this with him.

And this was a guy that I would still automatically label as evil and insane and dangerous – if this had not happened.

AND: there is nobody out there: this transformation in the mind from evil madman to graceful Son of God has already happened – and is just being mirrored back to me from the “outside.”

I am awakening from the dream – “with a little help from my friends.”

 

It

1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Mona Gustafson Affinito
    Mar 13, 2012 @ 16:24:56

    Wonderful story of love and grace — his and yours.

    Reply

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Please note that nothing written here is intended as medical advice. Readers who think that they need help with a physical or psychological condition are advised to seek a qualified opinion.

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