Our human desperation

To any reader…I am amazed that you hang in there, after so much tales of woe and lament…thank you! This blog is a spiritual and disciplinary practice for me – to just document the movement in a psyche that has been, and still is to some extent, been strongly split from a very young age – and how Love and A Course in Miracles-teaching are gently guiding back to my Self.

Any non-gently process comes from my judging what is presented to me to work with, to sit with, to be with, to just accept as such. This night was ALL filled with desperation. At about 5:30 I started to hear Blue’s voice, nudging me gently to see that this was the degree of desperation I had all the time as a child – and successfully denied and repressed – and this morning, when I heard His words, I also heard him mention that this desperation is the very refrain in the Sonship who still has not woken up.

“It is the desperation of the confused individual using psychological and spiritual means to BECOME awake and enlightened – all that striving, telling yourself that you are NOT as God created you. All that is required is resting AS the perfect Christ Self you are – any “trying” is just cementing the false identity. Remember -“ and here was a big smile  in the voice – “you need do nothing.”

I started to giggle, and was in that moment able to BE WITH all that desperation as it raged through the body. It was just a memory, now I could receive it and embrace it as a common predicament that brought me closer to the human race.

And for the first time I truly embraced and welcomed all that desperation-energy


3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Mona Gustafson Affinito
    Nov 17, 2014 @ 02:24:52

    Of course we hang in there with you — what an opportunity to share in the beauty of growth.


    • leelotchka44
      Nov 17, 2014 @ 11:28:02

      right now it feels like i am hanging in a superthin thread over a chasm – so your words are very comforting


      • Mona Gustafson Affinito
        Nov 17, 2014 @ 17:46:39

        I am so glad if my words help. Wish there were more one could do. You offer so much to others. It would be good if you could reach out and gather some of the bread you have cast upon the waters.

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Please note that nothing written here is intended as medical advice. Readers who think that they need help with a physical or psychological condition are advised to seek a qualified opinion.

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