Inner Guidance comes in many ways

I awake at 3:13 – feeling beyond bad. I tune in, and find that there is an innermost belief in mankind – subconsciously agreed upon – that we NEED to be punished, and that when we attack ourselves – in any way – we are safer towards God.

I sank deep within this belief, and found that at its center, I believed that fear was my friend: it was my whipper – my savior – from the fierce vengeful god-image we collectively and subconsciously have at our very core.

This seems to explain how the majority of us treats ourselves worse than we would treat an enemy – relentless in our demand of improvement – not recognizing that we ARE perfectly made in His image

What a relief it was to relax into that false idea and rest there in curiosity and wonder –

at first…

then the stories came up from the vast collective unconscious – the cornerstones to our world, based on fear, guilt and sin. A garbage dump with toxic waste.

I sat up in bed and turned on the light. I – the One Mind – had made this. So I owned that, did not judge it, and extended forgiveness to myself. The body felt like a transformer of atomic energy, scary, very scary. And electric! Then I sensed and saw The Christ Council around me, and St.Germain talked to me and said, “we did not know this place as you show it to us now. Thank you for your willingness and courage to go deep.”

I struggled like crazy hearing this – my ego switched from pumped up pride to crushed unworthiness – thank God I was aware that I am not that – that we are not that. Still, I asked him to give me a sign that what I heard here was not a delusion.

Nothing happened – and what a gift that was: I became acutely aware of how afraid I am that I am making these visions up, a sort of schizophrenic spell. Becoming aware of HOW afraid I was, was a gift – so I stayed with that energy and allowed it to pass through me.

The then thought of my book – “When Fear Comes Home to Love” came into my mind. I wrote it with Blue – or Jesus -as my guide, and self published it. St.Germain told me to post “Blue is playing”-episodes from the book here on my blog. These are playful synchronicities from the divine, helping me to move from fear to humor and play – a great way to transform darkness. The book is full of them. And here is the latest – from this morning:

This morning the night’s experiences had passed from my memory. I was standing beside a heap of my notebooks and picked up nr 18 and opened it, not knowing why.

It opened on this note, from June 2014:

St Germain says to me, in the night: “Don’t leave your truth, your heart, when you sense the fear. Appearances only.Breathe deeply into the energy. When you leave yourself,you have told yourself that fear is in YOU, and you have left your house – the Self -and then it is open to “thieves”J All are stories – they arise when you for a nanosecond believe that there CAN be a place where God is not – can you see how utterly laughable that is -“

Yes I can and I do 🙂

And now the memories from the night come back – and me asking for a sign from St.Germain in the night, that what I experienced him saying was not a fantasy from ego.

How grateful I am, that the work that we do, all contribute to the Christ Council. That deleted effectively ego’s insistence that the Christ Council is far far out of reach for “me”, and “above” me.

A deep wave of gratitude and safety flows through me – and the phone called:

A very polite and articulate man asked if it was OK to do a Gallup on how pleased I was with my alarm system –

oh the humor of Blue 🙂DSC_0406

I took this photo of my “Tree of Life” that I planted some months ago. I had started to give up on it – until this morning: on the same branch as the withered brown leafs, there is this shining red one

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Please note that nothing written here is intended as medical advice. Readers who think that they need help with a physical or psychological condition are advised to seek a qualified opinion.

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