About cancer and other terminal diseases – and healing

In  some of spirituality’s many labyrinths,  we find the these teachings:” If you practice correctly, you will not be sick/ ill – and you will  heal the illness.”

I just wrote this to a friend and teacher – who recently wrote this in her blog:

“If to love oneself is to heal oneself, those who are sick do not love themselves.” – A Course in Miracles.”

First – I think this may be a quote that misses important clarification after the point.

With respect, there are many loving teachers and masters who had cancer and died from it – and I believe they loved themselves – don’t you?
I think I remember that you wrote earlier about exactly this –that reading this for anyone who has cancer or any chronic disease, will feel like a judgment: “you are not practicing the Course “correctly.” Or “enough.” Which are not loving thoughts – are they? There is a harshness in that.

I see friends with cancer – like f.ex. Diederik Wolsak, Ondrea Levin and Pema Deane who share how living with terminal disease has demonstrated for the world a love that is encompassing the illness – and that this illness has truly softened them and melted away any old resistance to Love in their soul. I see how a well known and beloved artist in Norway now uses the cancer to allow every severe treatment the doctors give her, to share openly in our main paper each week the love and wisdom that IS her, while going through this ordeal. Thousands on Facebook – users praise her for showing them the Love that can live through this ordeal.

She had before the illness the cutest face. Now it is transformed by Cortisone. She posts the new face in the paper and on Facebook. Now that is courage and love!

I cruelly judged myself when I got cancer, just because of isolated quotes like  this. What I did was the following two things: 1) I found the little tortured child within the space in the breast that had the cancer cells and listened to her fully, giving her all my love. 2) I asked Archangel Michael’s power to go through the radiation machine, and from that moment the skin and breast were not damaged from the rays.

What I did was seeing the illness not as something I had done/practiced “wrong,” but something that gave me a possibility to see differently – as something that brought MORE Love forth in me.

It truly stripped away so much of what I had thought was essential, and identified as “me.”
Without it I would not believe FULLY that I am supported and served by Jeshua, angels and masters.

I know that if I had judged myself for the cancer I would have died there and then.

With so much love
 Leelah

Hilaryon Stories – the Botany of Loss,Longing and White hares

For six years I have worked on a novel – guidance told me it had to somehow touch on the feud between Pharaoh and Moses in the Old Testament. I have never been able to digest that image of God, so I thought is was a good idea to do it like it happened in this book- giving it all over to my Muse, who turned out to be Master Hilaryon of the 5th Ray -! –

Now the book is almost formatted completely – and I want to present the Cover here. I stitched/embroidered it myself 🙂

Synchronicities

Inner prompts have lately asked me to investigate more about Morphogenetic Fields.

This morning, after the I AM ONE SELF-night, my breakfast yogurt looked like this:

I have never seen this before in my yogurt.

So I went to the PC and googled Morphogenetic Fields – knowing it had to do with fields of energy, patterns etc – and came to the article and image :

Looking forward to this – since I am lately working intensely with the archetypal patterns described in  my book “When Fear Comes Home to Love” – archetypes are surely kind of superstrong habitual patterns of thinking and energies.

I AM ONE SELF

The last 6 months or so I have worked with a brilliant copyeditor  for my novel. “Hilaryon Stories – the Botany of Loss and Longing and White Hares.” During that process, the old pattern of confusion and distractions have played with both of us – the most silly and unthinkable digital pranks have shown up; there has been a lot for me to catch hold of and tend to inside.

I have prayed constantly to see all this differently – to see each other  as innocent and not stupid and wrong.

When my cover formatter joined us, there were impossible errors showing up in the text on the back cover – and pointing out these errors to him and calling him to  correct them called up tremendous fear. I sensed the Fuckeat archetype rising– and telling me if I did this to B, he would come after me and kill me.

It felt so very convincing – this is what lies under the common belief “ I am stupid. There must be something wrong with me.”

Until I remembered the energetic law – what I focus on, I empower.

So after a month with this constant fear and new errors each day, I decided to deal with fear differently. I found one of my small notebooks and opened it. It said ( bolding is mine: )

Lesson 95 I AM ONE SELF

  1. Begin the practice periods today with this assurance, offered to your mind with all the certainty that you can give:

I am one Self, united with my Creator, at one with every aspect of creation, and limitless in power and in peace.

Then close your eyes and tell yourself again, slowly and thoughtfully, attempting to allow the meaning of the words to sink into your mind, replacing false ideas:

I am one Self.

Repeat this several times, and then attempt to feel the meaning that the words convey.

  1. You are one Self, united and secure in light and joy and peace. You are God’s Son, one Self, with one Creator and one goal; to bring awareness of this oneness to all minds, that true creation may extend the allness and the unity of God. You are one Self, complete and healed and whole, with power to lift the veil of darkness from the world, and let the light in you come through to teach the world the truth about yourself.
  2. You are one Self, in perfect harmony with all there is, and all that there will be. You are one Self, the holy Son of God, united with your brothers in that Self; united with your Father in His Will. Feel this one Self in you, and let It shine away all your illusions and your doubts. This is your Self, the Son of God Himself, sinless as Its Creator, with His strength within you and His Love forever yours. You are one Self, and it is given you to feel this Self within you, and to cast all your illusions out of the one Mind that is this Self, the holy truth in you.

I have felt this Self each time I have sat down with it – so I have used the fear and distraction-occurrence to choose to rest in THIS instead.

When at last the cover was clear, I broke the trance of fear and chose to mail the formatter, addressing the underlying rage and revenge-energy, owning my part of it and telling him I wanted to see some of his beauty-images, not only the dark ones. He answered with love and humour and 3 images radiating truth.

After this, my sleep was filled with light and humorous dreams. I dreamed I had borrowed a heap of clothes from a store, I needed none of them – and a friend  told me she had returned them FOR me. What a sign – to give up the idea that I have to “do it all myself.”

And each time I have felt negative sensations this night I have said “I AM ONE SELF” and have felt how Its energy suffuses and melts the low frequency.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Homeopathic Love

I had a free session with Debbie Moore from Feminine Power, offered because I registered early. I presented my age-old problem of having worked with all kind of parts and inner children for 30 years – and still having that same old intense fear-pattern in my nervous system.

After half an hour she tells me: ” I will feed your little two year old terrorized agonized soul-part/ girl homeopathic LOVE.”

1 drop only.

And then the release started – the sweetest possible love seeped in.

And one more drop – and my inner child opened her eyes – and nodded – and said to herself. “Yes. This is ME.”

***

I had told Debbie that my soul has chosen to go this deeply in this life, so I can truly help others find their deepest hidden stuff and safely and lovingly allow it into the Love that we are.

When I trained in Kabbalah, my master was also a master in Homeopathy. I have taken the strangest remedies! – and one of the strangest and strongest was Wolf Milk. Love from Wolf!

Unconditional Love in Homeopathic strength was stronger.

It has helped me to truly respect  the depth of my training, energy wise, in this life: bringing these predator/ victim ancestral patterns into THIS life, and now gloriously offering the remedy to the two year old –and then choosing to share it with all the rest of my parts.

I have always had the gift of seeing right into the center of energies / nervous systems, and now and then matter opens to me, allows me to find a terrorized child part – like the one I found in my left breast when I had breast cancer. Seeing her, I could talk to her and listen, she disappeared, and Archangel Michael came on my request and  placed HIS RAYS  inside the radiation machine – so the skin lost its burns and I knew all was well.

In Homeopathy, the effects are stronger the more diluted the remedies are. That makes no sense to a mind that sees bodies as solid – quantum physics now proves what seers like me always have known: all is connected with all, what we focus on we touch with our mind and intention, and what we call “me” attaches itself to me and continues to drive our life with old and outdated beliefs until we turn toward it and bless it all eternally.

Here is how I drew it:

Please note that nothing written here is intended as medical advice. Readers who think that they need help with a physical or psychological condition are advised to seek a qualified opinion.

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