Healing the ancestral line

Long times ago, my daughter, then ten, was about to have surgery. I decided to tape the most beautiful music I knew onto a tape she could listen to when under anesthesia. I found that tape today, and I started to text M how filled that tape was with my love for her. I wrote from my heart, and when I read it through, I thought it sounded pompous and bombastic. I got a really strong impulse to delete it – but chose to wait a bit. Next time I looked at the phone, M had sent me 38 hearts.

As I sat and allowed those hearts to be received and embraced, it dawned on me that this fear of being “pompous” comes from my father – and his father before him – far away back. Behind is was a fear of being ridiculed while being innocent and straight ( and presumably not “masculine”.) I set an intention to return it to the original sender and all the related ancestors with my blessings and forgiveness.

This has been a deep healing process for me – and when I “sense into” the energy of returning it with love and no judgment, I can see and sense how that frequency lightens up and is healed far far back into my ancestral line.

So something to ponder about – ask yourself ” who does this belong to?” and if you “hear” a name or “see” a face, let it all be returned, with all the love you can muster for the agony of so much self hatred and guilt.

And may I invite you to have look at my three books in the right menu. “Hilaryon Stories” is the last one – a novel about healing deep old hatred with playfulness and music.

 

Corrupted files

A couple of days ago, I had an overwhelmingly strong feeling of being taken over by an alien force. It felt like “I” was sucked out – and instead, this other energy took me over, filled me to the brim, seeped in to all my cells, just took me over.

Since I am committed to going the distance, I knew that this was something that would bring me closer to Love – it happened for me, not to me. I went to bed  early and asked for dreams to illuminate what was going on.

It came at 3am:

I was sleeping on a mattress on the floor in a big room with hundreds of others. At my head sat a man with a foul expression, and suddenly he pushed his fingers hard into the space below my collarbone – in Chinese medicine, K 27. I grabbed his left hand and just bit through his finger – there was no blood in that finger, and no pain response from the man.

I woke up and realized that this was not a man, it was an energy frequency of base and vile attack. It had a double meaning: the feeling of corruption and toxicity was strong – an energy of male disgust and disrespect for women – but  there was nothing sexual about it. So, very confusing. I asked my Self for insight, and heard that this was a taste of the main attack-and abuse-archetype I describe in my book  “When Fear Comes Home to Love”– “Fuckeat.” This was part of that frequency – and the question came, was I willing to love it?

Not in a million years! I muttered, and intuitively knew that, YES – I had signed up for this when I agreed to work with the archetypes of violence and abuse when I started up my therapy practice.

So now was the question – HOW could I bring Love to it?

It so happened that Carrie Triffet recently had given us in a course an exercise called breathing-with-Christ – allowing the Christ to enter our lungs and then breathing that love breath into and through everything we encountered.

It worked – slowly, but it worked. AND there was something within that “corrupted file” / demonic contempt/ that  S L O W L Y  released its dark form.

I can do this, and I will. Day by day, loving that corrupted field in the soul right into its sacred center. Carrie teaches – and I fully agree – that God is either inside everything or It is non-existing. So in the middle of any darkness, there is essential eternal Light – and we ARE this Light.

 

 

 

 

 

 

PLAY

These are extreme times. Everything humanity pushed down is coming up to be faced. As long as we face it with fear and judgments, it will stay. Facing it we must, if we choose to wake up to what does NOT work – outmoded thought systems of greed and fear, of them and us. And to start to bring Love into that, we need to look at our outmoded belief systems: where we have allowed fear to hold the reigns. Which is pretty much everywhere, I notice in myself – the judgments are queuing  up to be heard as true.

I notice the queue of judgments and I turn towards it, breathing the sweet Loves Breath that Jeshua teaches us in Way of Mastery. I allow this breath to infuse the judgemental queuing up to be heard as valuable advise: you should DO more. Learn more.READ more.

I sit with this part of me that has learned that intellectual knowledge is paramount in this world, and highly valued – and that Nature is something that we can take and grab and use for our own bodily needs, with no concern for ecology.

The judger within says to me:” I am so deadly tired. I can never relax. ALL the time I must get you to work even harder to understand, to make you fit in, to save you.” I breathe the Loves Breath into all of that, and the cramps slowly relax enough to let the Christ-suffused breath to seep in and do its wonder. And Blue, my inner guide, tells me to pick up my own book at the night table: When Fear Comes Home to Love -the healing gifts of art, play and forgiveness.  I open it randomly on page 238:

4 Sacred Play / 1994

I am never as happy as when I play. And as you will have noticed, so is Blue – our Divinity!

Play is about trusting – and enjoying! – the process from second to second. It is precisely this trust or faith we need to heal our relationship to The Myth, and start to transform the old patriarchal patterns.

In this chapter I am going to share examples, and some methods to deal with “stuff” in a playful way.

4.1 I am Leelah: teasing Mudmonster with rhythm / autobiography / 1998

I was attending a Psycho-synthesis-group, and the leader was giving us principles from the “Conversations With God”- books by Neale Donald Walsch as assignment: “Being The Highest That we are, we encounter that which we are not.” We were to contemplate the forces that we encounter, that we are not – an assign those to the other group-members, so that they could play them back to us.

I picked the forces “death-wishes,” “cold,” “dissociation,” “loss,” “darkness,” “apathy” and “fear” – and I gave each of the seven group-members one of the forces, and asked them to personify them and challenge me.

They withdrew in the corridor outside the room and mumbled together, agreeing on a strategy.

Then they entered. Massive attack was circling me: I was cornered.

I felt numb and paralyzed. Then angry. I started to fight with words: I argumented with them! VERY BAD CHOICE. They pinned me to the floor. I asked for another try.

This time, I was just present: listening to their threats and demeaning ways.

Suddenly I started to play: I span their sentences into a rhythm, and sang them back to them. Whatever they told me, I created a verse from it: they fed me with material for creation. I used their hate-talk as ingredients for a rap. In two minutes the atmosphere was transformed! They were completely bowled over – and they were laughing! It was impossible for them to stay in the roles of negativity when these word-rhythms came along.

The secret? NO RESISTANCE. Using whatever energy coming at me as food for play.

Later during the same group we are given questions, and answer them:

What is your greatest vision?

To draw forth the creative power in people and teach people to honor it and USE IT. To help people discover – find – God in PLAY and creativity.

What gives you passion?

To improvise and play and lead groups!

Who are you when you do this?

I AM DIVINE PLAY! I AM LEELAH!

I am sitting with my journal, answering the questions in writing. I am burning inside. The name Leelah reverberates inside in a strong rhythm. I ask silently: “Am I really Leelah? Give me a sign!”

As I say these words, I am looking at a building outside the windows. It has lots and lots of windows. Only one is lighted. In the same second I ask for the sign, the light goes out of the window.

Now, Mudmonster*** would have me believe that this sign shoved me that I was NOT Leelah – but the strong rush of energy through my body, and the tears streaming down my cheeks told me otherwise.

*** Mudmonster is one of the archetypes I describe in the book – the part of us that paints the devil on the wall to warn us of what MIGHT happen.

***

Lately I have heard from some of you that when you try to buy one of my books, you get  a sign that says ” this book is not for sale in your country.”

Which is bullshit 🙂 Try again, friend – try again – and let me know so I can bring it on to Amazon 🙂

FOCUS

The process is calling LOUD out that I FOCUS on what I will do. This obviously has to do with healing my addiction to confusion as an excellent separation-gig.

So today I chose to look into the mail for a message I was waiting for – and it was not there – so I automatically and thoughtlessly logged into an author forum –  and soon felt very stressed. STILL, I stayed there and played for a while.

Then I logged off -and after some minutes I noticed that the radio automatic had changed from Swedish Classical Music to Norway p 1.(Main channel.)

My energy had switched from the higher frequency of classical music to the”main channel” which I from now on see as the ego-channel 😊

Another beautiful teaching yesterday: lately, ZOOM has steadfastly alleged that I my identity is not VALID. After having struggled with that for 2 days, I went to the Zoom on my desktop and opened it as “administrator.” I stated out loud: I know my identify as the Holy Child of God – and still I have to use the ID numbers you (Zoom) has given me.

Then it accepted the numbers and let me in.

And because I did NOT focus when I pasted this post from Word – the whole doc came out with a line all through all lines. – I saw that I had NOT focused when I logged on – and instead of focusing, I just nodded OK ( but did not TAKE TIME) and the line-through went right through Holy Child of God.

Oh hilarious! And the most beautiful is that I do not feel any guilt for it – just giggles

***************

And now to something really important ( if you are still here?)

I invite you to take a peek into When Fear Comes Home to Love – look into the reviews and you will see what it is about. If you have been attracted to this blog, it will be for you.

And so will the two other books of course.

 

SPRING CLEANING

The last days, at ca 3pm cest, a huge field of consciousness takes me over, and I start getting thoughts and beliefs: I NEED TO DO SOMETHING

A friend messaged me the same – and that helped me SEE and recognize the invisible belief behind that enormous wave of consciousness

So I wondered about this and found a collective human thought- and as all collective thoughts, it is about God and we being guilty and sinful and needing punishment to pay off that guilt. And that God is not my God, but ancient parts of me believe in him, and I bet these ancient parts are alive in you too

The may be stuck cozily into a room that is named “silliness – I am a rational being, there IS no God” or this room: “ I must do The Right Things-or else” ( what the heck IS The Right Things?) –

Or this room: “God is out to get me – I am full of unnameable sh*t. I MUST not know what I have done, it will be the end of me. “

Yes, and this room:- “ there is nothing I CAN do. But I must DO something!”

The rooms are all splendidly convincingly furnitured and decorated by the ego – the masterdesigner.In some of my rooms I have to roam through endless labyrinths to the toilet – which then is shockfull of sewage.  Since one of my old beliefs is “nobody will listen to me, I have nowhere to dispose of my sh*t.”

 You will have your own rooms, my friend – as long as we believe ourselves to be separate, there will be guilt.

NOW the Corona virus has brought it up in us all to be noticed. That is a good thing: NOW I can look about and wonder how to relate to it with curiosity and wonder:

I wonder how I could draw this energy? Paint it? Allow random words to come from it – place them together in a poesy structure? How could I allow it to move my body?

When we are caught in the belief, we suffer. When we relate to it – in wonder, we are free and creative. We all have that opportunity NOW.

If you answer “ That will NOT help, I will NOT try AND be disappointed” that is just a thought too –  isn’t it?

After having worked with people since 1988 in this way, I know it DOES work, and it has nothing to do with being clever and artistic – just a little willingness to put away these disaster- thoughts for a while, and just play.

We have them, they are not who we are.

Here is a poem I wrote recently – it is a mirror poem, readable from both sides. My friend told me it helped her, so here it is.

SPRINGSONG / 17.4.20

When you don’t know where to go and what to do

sit down and do nothing.

Breathe the calm unfluttering air

and watch the blackbird sucking it all in and swallow it.

Then allow the song to be exhaled in a musical way

 

while you look at a little boy

and watch the happy dog running over the green green field

then get up and breathe that song back inside

you did a great job indeed,

tell yourself that you did a great job

breathing that joyful song out

 

Breathing that joyful song out

tell yourself that you did a great job

you did a great job indeed,

then get up and breathe that song back inside

and watch the happy dog running over the green green field

while you look at a little boy

 

Then allow the song to be exhaled in a musical way

and watch the blackbird sucking it all in and swallow it.

Breathe the calm unfluttering air

 sit down and do nothing.

When you don’t know where to go and what to do

 

For those who are interested in playful non-demanding exercises to deal with fear and resistance, I have written a book just for this times:

Healing Crisis – 108 ways to turn Crises into Possibilities

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Surrender

Happy Easter and Passover, all!

What a lovely word – Passover. What if humanity is truly passing over an old old schism in these Coronadays – forcing us ( helping us) to change our perception from fear to love – choosing love as our preferenced filter to look at anything – the Coronavirus in particular.

Some of us have the strange habit of choosing to welcome whatever illness that comes to us. I have learned this from my beautiful friend Leni.

So I welcomed the Coronavirus to say hi. I saw her as the epitome of Femininity – and that her intention with arriving now, was to manifest deep change in our outmoded fear based thinking. I personally notice the ways she makes it more difficult to breathe – I already have lungs that have a weakness, and deep breathing brings up feelings. When we don’t breathe fully, all those old pesky feelings can go downstairs and compromise our immune system.

Now most of us will be visited by what we have pushed down – and that will teach us how to shift our outmoded thought system thoroughly.

Lately I have had most of the symptoms – except fever, which I almost never have. I have felt my lungs contract when in a fear based state of mind – sensing the C-presence-  and as soon as I have reminded myself that I am Spirit, created in the image of Source, the breathing gets OK again. Then I have actually seen the image of the Corona smile at me. Saying gently: resisting makes it real for you. Surrender to me – like now – and you will flow through.

I know that surrender to it does NOT mean saying ” Oh it is not use, it is deadly, it is much stronger than me blah blah.” Surrender – to me –  means:

It is here to teach me something – to give me a gift. Please show me the gift – and I surrender to what is shown to me.

Take it or leave it folks:) I am not here to tell you what to do, but to share what works for me.

And for that reason, I will share here some reviews of my book “When Fear Comes Home to Love” – (look in the right menu)  since my readers here may just have something in common with  the way I think and feel and vibrate 🙂

I have choose some of the shorter ones.

Feather

5.0 out of 5 stars Pure Love 

Reviewed in Germany on 8 June 2016

Verified Purchase

*

Gr8fulme1
5.0 out of 5 stars Healing Old Wounds

Reviewed in the United States on 22 May 2014

Verified Purchase

 

 

Miracle

The last day the fear returned with a vengeance. I prayed deeply to be free of the sticky attachment to all of it – and suddenly, it was gone.

The fear energy still is here – but it now feels like a dummy- love bursts through. It does not matter anymore. From this state of mind there is only rest.

My young friend Leni Dubel just wrote on Facebook that illnesses are beings – messengers – they come to heal. Many cancer patients know this deeply after a while – by going through it, there are shining insights. My strongest experience as a breast cancer patient 15 years ago was that I learned that my choice is everything:

I was under the radiation machine, it was the 12th day and the nipple was badly bruised – it seemed that it was rotting and drying up. I heard myself exclaim: Archangel Michael, I want your rays to go through this machine instead of the x-rays.

In that very moment, there was a great Light and I knew without doubt that my prayer had been fulfilled.

From that moment, the effects of the machine-radiation reversed, and the breast returned to it original healed state of being. I also knew that there were no more signs of cancer.

What if I got that cancer to get to that moment – KNOWING that Spirit heals all if I CHOOSE it?

It seems to me that Cancer made it possible for me to get to that moment where I took that chance to ask for help from Spirit, being willing to suspend any beliefs that the body’s illnesses and pain were more powerful that Spirit. It was a huge leap of faith for me, and it was instantly answered.

The strangest and most wonderful surprise for me is that I still feel that fear-energy strongly – but it really has nothing to do with me. I can  hold it, or just let it be, and I c an bless anybody in this fear and agony in their ability to choose love instead.

This is said with the utmost tenderness for all who says ” but I DO choose Love, and nothing happens.”

This was my experience for many years – and it brought me to explore all those parts of me who were selfhating and bitter and filled with vengeance. Carrie Triffet showed me in her last book “The Frickin Map is Upside Down” how important it is to LOVE them just as they are – no fixing – loving them WITH their hatred, with deep patience and compassion – loving them as they are. And as A Course in Miracles says – ” we cannot heal what we still have not accepted and loved.”

I don’t love the hatred. I love the part who hates.

*******

In the right menu you will find my three books. In these days, my book ” Healing Crisis – 108 ways to turn crises into possibilities” can give you creative playful means to deal with the fear and transform your regulations to it. Like this one:

54) YOUR ANCHOR

What served as an anchor for you when you were a child? What did you ”come home to” – inside yourself or outside? Maybe a favorite day-dream – do you remember the theme? Pets? Music? Nature? Reading? Walking? Making art?  Knitting? Wood-work?

Contemplating this anchor –why was it an anchor?  WHAT is it that was – and is – such a nourishment and comfort for you?

How could you use this anchor now, during the crisis?

(Source of inspiration:

Serge Kahili King, PH.D. http://www.huna.net/

and this:

108 GROUNDING / OVERWHELM[1]

Walk around in the room: point at objects and name them out loud. Do it until you start feeling that you are inside yourself. Then do a variation: point at a thing and name it something else: point at pillow and name it cheese, point at a TV and name it flower, point at the table and name it circus…the dog comes in, and you name her sunshine. Do this for at least ten minutes, and then sit down and see if you can remember some of the new names you invented.

The exercise has a wonderful ability to ground us, shove us out of rigid control-modes and let us laugh – and then, additionally, allow the subconscious to show us what it plays with. Right now.

When we are in a crisis, we are also stuck in a rigidly controlled space. When we are stuck inside it, everything we do or think is perceived through a veil of mistaken identity: I AM that which suffers. To break through this false identity gives you a new footing: suddenly you can see yourself AND the crisis – but you are no longer caught in it. Exercises like this one push you out in free air: yes, there is a crisis in your life right now – but there is also play and creativity.

And you might also enjoy re-naming your crisis, too – ! Instead of” crisis,” you might try out “popcorn.”

“I am in a deep popcorn right now.”

Did you giggle just a little?

 

[1]  Source of inspiration for this exercise: Keith Johnstone: Improvisation and the Theatre
©1979, Methuen Publishing, London

http://www.keithjohnstone.com/main.aspx?id=73

 

 

 

Lonely Girl in the Heart Comes Alive

In the usual night agony, I heard a clear and no-nonsense voice: sit up right now!

I did, and in a king of whoosh I saw that the carrier of the agony energy was my spiritual ego – the one who has followed 10 Mystery schools  and  a zillion of trainings and and and and still feels this agony/rage/anxiety/death wish/killing lust.

It’s simply the whole “false” identity, the perceived “separate one” – the one who sees herself as NOT healed and worthy and a failure – she is ALL OF THAT.

And after reading Carrie Triffet’s last book – about the importance to completely utterly love the “subterranean self” – or those parts of us we have kept as a secret…that I fully acknowledge her presence, and realize how unavoidable it is to continue AS her. From now on relating TO her – is my intention.

Now, this night, I saw that I was asked to intend to LOVE ALL OF THAT – the whole old package of “the ego though system” as the Course calls it – all those parts of me that I had attached to those thoughts and called MINE and ME.

IT was strange to get up in the morning – it felt different. I could neutrally watch “her” and all her thought patterns – but they did not attach to me. That much. I witnessed her go bananas when she lost something on the floor – for the first time did I allow her to yell and curse and it felt just fine and NEUTRAL. No judgment.

She like very much to be praised for having been such a good girl – and I enjoy doing that, loving her, truly loving her, embracing her with what Carrie calls “the rose-golden Light.”

Bow this is weird and wonderful: the above in blue attached itself here ABOVE the text that I had composed on Word and copied. When I clicked glue in, it came too – helping me realize that what I wrote today was the continuation of the blue text.  Clearly  this is archetypal matter.

Lonely Girl in the Heart

 

In the middle of the Heart

there is a fog of woe and wonder –

so little known to itself,

so dreamingly absorbed in the

layers of illusion.

But look:

it’s floating in the Sun of the heart!

I am so lonely so lonely

and I do not know of my fears –

I sense them only when I am held

but very carefully, or I’ll burst into a million little pieces

someone has stolen my words

and my hopes

but my story is still here

under the layers of centuries.

I have a right to tell the story,

but who are the listeners?

A great light and soft love surround me when I finished writing the above, and a Voice speaks:

Child, listen – I am your mother, Aurora – Queen of the Heart

And I know that She has listened to it all

 

The inner Child is doubting that Aurora is real: “Please give me a sign, Blue – let me see this name within three days!”

Next day I read in the column for TV/radio: “Arcadian radio and The Arcadian Explorer’s editorial Staff continue their trip down Mississippi on the riverboat Queen Aurora.”

*

Today is 23.March 2020 – 22 years after I wrote the above, as a part of my book “When Fear Comes Home to Love”  – and I found the child, the Heart -and -body connection was made, and my whole experience of life has changed.

Before that, earlier today,  I sensed with deep grief that I truly wanted to be grounded – but there has always been something that refuses to be inside the body. I have sensed there is a root connection through my feet and the perineum – but I wanted the feeling/energy of the dissociated child  to be fully incarnated. I prayed deeply for help with this, and suddenly I KNEW that she was HERE – inside me – and the mother of all griefs burst forth. I have never cried like THAT before – completely new quality – now embracing all that loneliness.

Do you know what more is present:

My creativity – and two years of crazy wolf hunger is GONE

JUST GONE

The constant inner strong bumping pulse in the midsection – gone

So now I knew how I feel – and how SHE felt – so I decided to play with her with words. It felt like an adorable little girl of 4 years was present, a separate being – and I communicated with her just as I would do with a girl of flesh and blood.

It was very helpful to have worked with “parts” most of my 30 years as a therapist 😊

She has been behind the wolf hunger – and the impossibility to do anything creative and playful. Now she composed an adorable story about a pig who had the moon inside her and spread moonlight all over her surroundings.

I am aware that this energy of her needs time to solidify and integrate. Of course! Bless her!

 

I feel tired in a healthy way.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Holding Others’ Energy

Here is a chapter fro my book “When Fear Comes Home to Love” – see the right menu. When I still had patients, this theme repeated itself for some weeks, so I could find it and name it. And this night I used what I learned at that time to release to my deceased mother’s soul a big bunch of trauma/accumulated repressed stuff.

I have for a week or so had a lung-illness that I thought were going to take my life. Coughing felt dangerous and raw. I asked many times “who does this belong to?” and my mother came up – and today I at last took it serious and called her soul forth, and returned the energy to her with my blessings.

Afterwards, the lungs feel very different. I still cough, but there is nothing threatening about it.

I thought I would post here one of the chapters from WFCHtL – since I experience that many of us do this as a loyalty to our  family  and loved ones – and for me, it has meant that I never really knew what was ME and what was her.

Here is the chapter:

4.1 The gout that was fear /1992

Eric is on the phone:

“I have got this terrible pain in my foot… it has swollen, it takes all of my attention. I can’t come to session today.”

“Do you want to take the session on phone?”

“I think it hurts too much, I can’t concentrate on anything but the foot.”

“What if that foot carried a painful memory. Could we use the opportunity and see what the pain is a metaphor of?”

“OK. I’ll call at 3pm.”

“Fine. Till then.”

*

“How did the pain come into being?”

“It started yesterday… it swelled, it is kind of an inflammation…. I have had this once before, and the doctor said it was gout… it is a bit embarrassing, gout is what older men may get In this moment I recognize and connect the energy to Eric’s grandfather. He died thirty years ago, but in Eric’s’ mind and soul his memory has still a strong effect, and carries with it a sense of horror that makes Eric split off a part of himself.

“Eric – when you speak about the pain in the foot, I get in touch with the energy from your grandfather. Could this pain have something to do with him?”

“I feel cold shivers down my spine!”

“Shall we look closer into this?”

“Yes. I want that.”

“Close your eyes. Allow your consciousness to sink down into your heart…your hands…let it  pass from one hand to the other…note that you choose where to put your attention, you decide, you are the authority…now shift focus – let the awareness go to a place in your body which feels good.”

“…That is my belly. It is absolutely delicious there.”

“Good – let the consciousness go there, rest there a while… let it expand. If you want, allow this delicious energy to follow your consciousness down into the pain in the foot, so the deliciousness can wrap itself safely about the pain… surrounding the pain with love, warmth, support.”

“I am doing it now.”

“And now be aware of everything you are experiencing while focusing on the painful foot: inner images, memories, colors, forms, sounds – all is relevant as long as you focus on the foot, and your intention is clear. – Oops- we forgot that one. What is your intention with this?”

“My intention is to come closer to the pain and fear within the foot to release it! – I see a bonfire… I see the yard by my mother’s childhood- home … my grandpa is lying at the one big window, he is dying… I and my cousin are peeping through the window and see him lying there, and I sense a strong and ominous fear.”

In this moment I see “something” release itself from Grandpa’s psyche; float out through the window and into Eric.

“Eric – it looks to me as something from Grandpa’s fear came into you, and that the ominous fear you are feeling is coming from him. Could this be the right time to let it go?”

Eric is crying.

“I see it! And I see that what I feared most, I took into myself and made mine – because I could more easily control it when it was inside me!”

“What kind of pay-off have you had from this?”

“It has been a way for me to protect myself.”

This I recognize from my own life: by taking over mother’s and father’s split off soul-fragments and take them into myself, I got a sense of control that seemed life-important for me at that time.

“Now I see what is behind his fear: I see a little boy, it is Grandpa as child – he is scared to death of going insane, he is franticly scared of not getting out of what feels like a prison. It looks like he is sitting inside a box. It is very narrow.”

“Do you want to go on carrying him inside any longer?”

“No – Grandpa shall have him back.”

“Anything you want to tell the boy, before you part?”

“We thank each other. I have needed him, he thanks me for letting him stay with me since Grandpa died, so he wasn’t homeless.”

Eric breathes deeply when he is being thanked by the little boy.

“Is he ready to go home to Grandpa, Eric?”

“There must come somebody to follow him, he says – there comes Grandpa! A big and loving angel is following him. I open the door to the box where he is sitting, and he runs straight to Grandpa who receives him… they go into the light now – they are melting into one…!”

Pause

“Now I am completely present. Right here. Now I am only Eric.”

Three days later he calls: the gout has almost disappeared.

Warm and happy feedback for Hilaryon Stories

Second review of Hilaryon Stories:

Hi dear one, I finished the book – and miss it dearly! I wish, I could read on every night from now on!

The sense of it all still escapes my mind, yet it left me feeling uplifted and joyful, playful and very grateful!
When I did a little grounding meditation yesterday, I decided to visit my belly from the inside. ( My belly has been like seven months pregnant for years, feeling uncomfortable. I believe, I shut it down in many ways.) So I let my awareness travel down there and found only darkness and barren land. Then, suddenly it started to transform! I saw grass growing, and streams meandering – looked like Ireland. A change again and it was a kind of Hobbitton ! Flowers, little houses and JOY! Abundance everywhere! Little people dancing, singing, eating, creating! Perhaps not so dissimilar to Hilaryon…
My life force energy was moving as a strong tingling in my lower belly! I just loved it!

Thank you so much from my Heart of Hearts!!!

If any reader of this blog may want to have look, here’s a link. My muse told me from the start it would be healing – and now I hear it is true.

here is a link to the Amazon US page. European may go to Amazon UK.

https://www.amazon.co.uk/-/e/B00DZ3EID4

 

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Please note that nothing written here is intended as medical advice. Readers who think that they need help with a physical or psychological condition are advised to seek a qualified opinion.

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