Gifts from the Universe

I live after the adage:  “As above, so below, as within, so without, as the Universe, so the Soul” – believed to be said by Hermes Trismegistus.

This was a spam that popped up on my beloved writer forum for two days – each time I tried to log in. I talked to Kit about it – how awful it felt to be locked out from the group – not reading the others’ poems this week, not being able to play with charades on another thread. I thought this COULD not be something my Self had “made” – but took advantage of the disgusting feeling I got at not having others to read and comment on my work.

Then I decided – YES, if I really can’t get in any more, I WILL write poems all the same. I also saw the pun: this was from TELENOR – the biggest Telecompany in the land I currently live and work. Telephone = metaphor for connection: a free gift from them sounds very good to me. And now I am giggling: it IS really a free gift to realize that I am not depended on others to create – and I made a vow to create  each day ANYWAY, even if only for a minute.

How did I make myself a hit for this scam? by constantly asking the Universe for help where i still am caught in old beliefs and energy-stuckness.

And after constant barrage of the sign for two whole days, and me taking that clear decision, today the writer forum is clear and available again – and my PC is healthy and well functioning.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Breaking through isolation

I am attending a teleclass with a phenomenal teacher, Zach Rehder – we are training in truly being with what we always have avoided. I couldn’t get through to him today in the class at the  web-conference – I heard that his line to me was shut off, and whatever I did to unmute myself, there was no movement.

So I mailed him, and he invited me to a short call – I shared the earlier decision to isolate myself and NOT be heard – he told me that my energy was opening up, and THEN I could sense it too!

A beautiful rush of spiritual purification showered through me – and writing about it here strengthens it – this IS the “new story” that Lisa Natoli told me I needed:

I am heard and loved, and it is witnessed-

we both laughed from joy

it is still here in me, moving

 

 

Mask or no masks

This morning I had a dream:

My sister – 84 – called my new cellphone, and i could not find out how to answer the call – how to operate my new phone. I slide the ruler from left to right, it does not take. I  feel stressed out when i suddenly spot a  little metal thingy that one can slide towards the right – and there’s the connection! I just had to take a new track to connect …I listen to her voice, and she is coming from her true Self. Wise,loving,patient,compassionate…I never met this sister before, I am thrilled!

When I wake up, I know that when we meet today I want to be straight about what kind of communication that does not work for me any longer.

At the bus to town, I start to feel the old usual doomsday-energy. Blue tells me to breathe into it, open it up and allow it to go – and he adds one important part:You don’t have to do the releasing part – all I need, is your little willingness, and your willingness to breathe and let go. You don’t need to believe that it works either 🙂” and it is the last part of the sentence that sets me free today: I realize that before i have always believed that I needed to have a proof that release had happened right away. Today, I just relax and trust him. I need do nothing.

My sister and I meet, and I tell her what I want re our communication, and it feels AWESOME.  There’s no fear at all present. The energy I am in when this happens changes my sister’s communication too. We are in my favorite coffee-shop, and I find myself going silly to the owner behind the counter – telling him that the last stamp on my coffee-card is not visible enough. I will surely miss the next free coffee because of it I say, and we fall into a gigglespell that ends with him stamping me one extra stamp. The energy around this communication is hilariously free and giggly, and completely out of habit for me.

Then I visit a Hamlet-production where all the players wear Hamlet’s mask as their mask…everybody is an outer projection of our inner forgiven “parts” – and what a strong moment it is when Hamlet – who is played by a woman – does the “be or not to be” monologue with her own mask in her hand, instead of a scull. Symbol not to be missed:)

 

 

More LU q&a’s

 December 1st, 2012, 8:44 pm

Dear Ilona, before I answer your questions, I need to explain something about my perception.
From I was small I have seen angels and beings that are invisible to most others. They are just as real to me as the physical world. And I have to tell you that the time I met a unicorn is one of my most loved experiences: it felt like an angel, but sweeter, more childlike. So I don’t know about Santa Claus 🙂 but Unicorns and other fable-creatures have been seen by me and countless others – just as we turn the channel – finder on the radio, we can fine-tune an inner channel-finder to this level of consciousness. The beings show their reality to me by their wise and loving communication.
I think most artists know what i talk about.
So this is not something i can call unreal when i experience it. I need to find a way to express these experiences/what is seen and heard on an astral level/ in a way that is workable for you. Otherwise you will ask me to check and see if it is real and not – and for me, this is definitely real, but I think not real like you mean it.I want to find out if it is doable by inquiry the way you do it. When asking if an angel is seen as real will be a clear yes ♥

 December 2:
Ilona:Hm, interesting. Do you see them angels and unicorns on your dreams or in waking state?
Both. But  it is strongest when I see them when awake. There is sensing of ” loving presence too” – the kind of presence that makes your hair stand up and tears come to the eyes. Listening inside in those situations is listening to words coming from another realm – one who knows of no separation, but who recognizes that “I” still do, so the “words” are given in ways that are most helpful. If this happens when I have clients or students, they too report that they sense the presence, which can be so strong that the knees buckles and we have to sit/lay down. – *
After having written that yesterday, I had a good night’s sleep – which is rare – and woke up today without the feeling of none of the old trauma me’s at all. Now there is only a sense of aliveness, presence, peace. No pressure – which is such a wonder. I have seen this effect with LU-guiding with Chris too – and you, some time ago, before him – that sometimes the guide says something, there is a strong resistance, and then, three days after or so, things have been sorted out, and the old resisted questions now is seen as simple and easy to answer.
So here are the answers to your last questions:

Ilona: can unreal have real power? can unreal be alive? if you look at superman now, has he got any powers?
it is not about REMEMBERING, but checking to SEE any given moment, if it’s true or not. remembering equals new belief. seeing unreal as unreal every time there is doubt, is what frees the mind from belief that imaginary stuff has power.

Superman has no powers.

Ilona: is there a me that can get sucked in? and isn’t this a resistance playing out that says NO to the specific energy? if so, invite it closer. dive into that energy and see what it is without labels and names.

There is only a thought of a separate self/Leelah. And yes, it is a resistance to a certain energy, coming from identifying with the false self.
This morning, a thought came: “I have thought that me and separate self is the same.” What a relief that was: the separate self is an illusion – I laughed when i looked at it – and there was no laugherer either, just a huge feeling of smiling space. When you have asked “can you find the me”, this Presence has always been felt to some extent – so I have had to say yes. And small separated self-identity has grabbed it and told itself that this Love is part of “me.” It is not, it is impossible, this Love can now be own, it is our very essence

Ilona: Is belief in a sufferer a feeling or a thought? how do you feel the sufferer? is there a sufferer or there is a thought that comes up and is believed to be true? does belief make a sufferer real?

Belief in a sufferer is a thought, believed in, not corrected, memory confused with now. Belief makes the sufferer SEEM real and brings all the stories and archetypes into this moment – and then the mind says “well, there are so much feelings and energies here, that must mean that the stories about them is real – they cannot come from nothing, can they??
They don’t come from nothing, they come from beliefs that seem to make the stories real. The me takes this as yet an opportunity to prove its separate existence.

Leelah  Dec.1st):Maybe it is some entity that dresses up like child-me in order to vampyrize me.Ilona:can you check if this is true. what is this entity and what is this me in the sentence there?

The entities are in my understanding from the lower astral field. It is my understanding that in the world of opposites they are symbols of mankind’s denied dark side – all that we see as bad and “I would NEVER do such a thing”. It represent all the uglies in the mind that we collectively has disowned – and what we resist, persist and may manifest as demonic in all kinds of forms. In my understanding again, they are not real since they do not come from Love. in my understanding, built on investigating in this for 45 years, only Love is real. But as I told you, that darkness may manifest as forms, as they do for people in psychoses. Luckily I have been there myself, in the youth, and vowed to find out where that stuff came from and how one could deal with it. That seems like a good thing to do, as long as one sees oneself as a separate being.
There might still be occasionally “visits” from “dark entities” – but seen from this view now, that is only a possibility to thank them and ask them if they need something – like my favorite saint, the Tibetan Milarepa did with the 5 demons who visited his cave. He welcomed them, and first he offered them tea – then he sang for them ( now 4 had left) and with the th, he put his head in its mouth to offer himself as food. And poof 🙂
So this answer is spoken from a vastly different place than believing they had power over “me.” There is no separate me – the demon and “i” seem to be different manifestations of mind – but in my understanding again ( my used only as means of communication) Life just is, and is lifing as you so wonderfully name it.

Please note that nothing written here is intended as medical advice. Readers who think that they need help with a physical or psychological condition are advised to seek a qualified opinion.

%d bloggers like this: