Crying out for Love

Yesterday a woman in my Way of the Heart-group shared that she used this sentence, suggested by Matt Kahn, when she was stuck:

“Thank you for helping me. Whenever you find the mind bracing against, irritated or troubled by a thought, person, circumstance, you remember to say ‘Thank you for helping me”

Because, indeed, it is all helping you. It’s the phenomenal display of what you haven’t found peace with yet.Thank you for helping me.Notice how in one holy instant, the resistance of mind drops away and the heart moves to connect and join with the grievance, a movement of gratitude, of appreciation, of true seeing. The whole experience softens and you no longer feel separate and in defiance of what is appearing. It’s a movement of consciousness, of heart – towards – rather than away from.”

It went marvelous for along while, and then in the night it just stopped. I asked for help. This “part of me” said, “MUCH better to end this life now. This will just get worse and worse. You know there is a voice in you that is stronger than Love and God.It will win.Just give it up!”

It listened to this for quite a while.

Then there was this clear, calm and truthful simple Voice who said: And exactly this is crying out to be loved by you.

There was an instant release – and it was instantly possible to say thank you to that doomsayer- voice: It showed me what I still haven’t included in Love, where love is still conditional.

The relief I felt was great: now I saw that this voice was NOT stronger than Love – and that I was NOT a victim of it. The love for it poured forth as a started to talk to it – “of COURSE you felt you needed to be right, no WONDER you have been fighting. You truly believe that your “reality” is real. You truly believe those stories that you are worthless and can not have love, ever. You truly are afraid of love, that it will betray you and trick you, much better to adapt to hell.”

The crazy body sensations tapered off as “it” knew it was not judged – and still, there was a fear of surrendering to Love and then hear a horrible laughter, “and you believed in that, moron? how stupid can you be!”

I can still sense the imprint after that shock in the mind.

“Of COURSE you don’t believe in Love then” I said, and it relaxed again.

And now the next stage:  I entered that resistance, and immediately hard the calm true Voice again: Remember – this is not being done TO you, but THROUGH you. The decision to explore this comes from Spirit – and the holy power given you by God is then twisted, hidden, denied and punished and made into this fearful identity, who truly believes in the thought of separation – that you and I are not One. – There is a thought – “It is unsafe to be Loved.” and you and only you charges  that thought  by choosing to believe in it. And by your consent this separate fear-driven “me” is being born – and is living out its hells, all deriving from that belief that it is unsafe to be Loved.

I SEE THIS NOW

 

No wonder this “me” feels safer in a place where suffering is predictable: at least it will not be tricked and shocked

I have made this. What a perfect strategy for keeping the ego going

This is a turnaround. There is no doubt any longer now that I DO choose – as Jeshua prompts us in Way of Mastery – to open to incarnate the Christ Consciousness through the body – to practicing desiring that. And of course that brings up everything I before have held as “me” and “valuable” to upheld that me.

When i read that yesterday, about being open to incarnate the Christ consciousness, I felt a great resistance. And so I met the resistance in the night and listened to it and felt love for it – and now I am willing.

As soon as I state my willingness to embody the Christ, I sense the resistance in solar plexus.  “Thank you for helping me see the place that still needs to be allow and included in Love.”

It is still there, as imprints – but no longer as sign of danger, signs of my “doing it all wrong.” Now its just energy that wants to be included. And the wonder is always that when i am truly willing, the unpleasantness transforms into bliss

*

I read the above into my little recorder and fell asleep. I dreamed that little girl about 4 years old came to me where I live now, and told me she just met a bunch of very drunk men in a wood. “One of them talked to me” she said, and I heard myself saying, “And he has SO  much respect for you!” “YES!” she says, knowing this is true – and so very pleased with this

Writing this now, I remember the group-rape in a wood when I was four

And I happily look at the dream and notice the different perception ♥

 

 

 

To resist or not to resist, that is the question

For five days and nights now, I have been in Heaven.

Each judgment has been met with kindness – gratitude, even – because there has been a radiant clarity that this is only coming up to be seen, neutrally – judgments included. Each time I have sensed a resistance to something, the same instant gratitude has arisen too: this is here so that Christ can bless this part in the mind through me, as me.

The gratitude bowled me over: I saw absolutely everything that arose in the mind as gifts, as a place where I now accepted God into those places to do all the healing.

Today I seemed to be back to the old ego-ways. I found myself struggling with “problems” and having to solve them “on my own” – and only after all kinds of silly reactions from people and PC did I recognize where I was at. Just caught in the old pattern of doing things without God.

It felt difficult at first to get back to that joyous simple way of being again, but it worked. I reminded myself to relax into the tense places in the body and just hang out with whatever presented itself – and when resistance and judgments arose, I reminded myself that exactly that could be accepted as something that I DID NOT have to fix on my own.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Whatever suffers is not part of me “- Acim

Usually, in December about solstice I use to get panic attacks and depressions of a disintegrating order. Very scary: No grounding. It started yesterday, and after two-three hours I remembered – “Whatever suffers is not part of Me.” Me meaning Who I really AM: Christed Self.

That’s all it took. Stories dropped, only raw energy remained – and I just lay in bed welcoming it, and knowing that this may not be what I thought it was – something that was a sign that I had done something wrong.

Without any stories and “small me” attached to it, it was just energy. It felt like atomic strong, but there was this knowing that whatever happened, the real me could not be harmed. And so, resistance fell.

Demasked

I have had several days with hateful inner voices – whose pattern is completely known and predictable, it’s like a tape going – gone through this uncountable times before, and each time I am aware that this cannot be “me” – and still it sucks me in, and I end up feeling identified with it – which truly hurts.

So this night I felt a decision to truly dive into that which underlies and causes that shitstorm. The focus was in my butt, which felt made of ice – and the deeper I came, the more resistance it seemed to create. I prayed for help.

Then, at one point, there was a shift – the identification went, and suddenly it felt very helpful and effective, healing-wise. Then I saw a group of elephants, and  I knew that I was working within the root chakra, where the earliest imprints are made about survival, feeling safe and nurtured. There were some primal feelings there that I allowed to come through me, they were all about feeling lonely and isolated. I was guided to do a practice that John Mark Stroud has taught us, that Jeshua taught him: to place the awareness at first inside the body – and then become aware of the space that surrounds us, HOLDS us in Love – and rest there, and then shift between this and body-awareness. I did not manage to get into the space outside of me – but suddenly I was certain that that space was infusing me and everything – so I chose to intend going into one of those “gaps” between matter and rest there – and instantly I felt peace and safety.

Now, from here I could turn to the very center of the hatred and anger at me for “doing it wrong” and I found myself blessing it. Or rather – I discovered Blessing and Grace as the very field embracing the core of hatred and anger. And now came the shift: I KNEW, beyond any doubt, that what the voices were hurling at me and threatening me, was not true: It was not true that I was alone and lonely – it was not true that God hated me and was out to get me. Intellectually, I had known this for years – but still, parts of me had felt completely driven and controlled by these false thoughts.

Now, this knowing that God/Love and I was One was felt kinesthetically . I saw blessing being everywhere and with everybody, no exceptions – only our imagination and perception may cloud it, if we choose to hang onto false thoughts.

To stop hating and fearing these hate-and-fear-thoughts – to just look through them with tenderness – can you imagine how wonderful it feels?

I hope you can

Velcro

7 October 2015 Velcro

When Peter and Mary visits, and Peter starts his thunder speech against Christians/bad parents whatever, I sit there silently simmering, because the energy of it feels terrible and I can’t stop it.

But The Course tells me that he is such a great mirror for me – so now, one day later, I choose to deal with it ( in this second, a shimmering colorful butterfly flies past my window, not minding that it is October.) So- what do I hate and condemn?

Giggle – I hate and condemn his hating and condemning

When I resist what somebody says, I make energetic hooks where the others’ energy gets stuck- like Velcro. When I change my part of the dynamic, the other will too.

Pema Chödrön, in her book Fail, fail again, fail better says “The Tibetans say the quality no longer have your nose ring ( because they used to put a ring in the nose of the yaks, and then they could pull the yak wherever they wanted.”)

I’d like to use the word Velcro – the two sides of the tape that hook into each other. Both sides/dynamics are needed for the tape to hold together – and when I drop mine, it’s like when you try to have the “feminine” side of the tape – the soft, sleek one – adhere to itself, it can’t be done – just like the hook-side/the masculine/ can’t hook onto itself either – it must have an “opposite” to hook into.”

Hah! I like that analogue

And Peter and I have a super strong Velcro between us. My (silent) resistance and damnation fuels him, feeds him: what you resist, persists.*

But Peter is gold and I love him – I truly know his pattern is a gift to me. And when they have left (we had a lot of laughs too) I can tend to how I feel.

I sink into the heart, breathe, and wait. Ah. Judging and hating anything only drives it deeper into darkness.

Surrendering the idea that small-me/ego shall fix this – “doing”

Doing by non-doing, says the Heart – just breathe and let it be, admit to your feelings of rage and impotence and let it be – releasing any idea of intervention

It reminds me of what my soul sister Ley does: she reminds herself that (ac.to the Course) whatever she listens to by whomever, already has happened -it is already forgiven and released –and in this mode, she can listen to whatever for whatever time, which creates the healing space for the situation to un-velcro itself – no resistance ♥

Oh oh oh in this moment a little greenfinch lands right on the windowsill just 50 cm away from me, it feels like a caress – and something in the brain lets go – all encompassing beautiful gentle release – it feels like wakening from a terrible and very long dream

 

*

 What you resist, persists / Dialogue with Blue 1997/From When Fear Comes Home to Love

This is the second dialogue I had with Blue. He is addressing me where I was at that time: completely victim-identified.

Dear Blue – please explain the expression “what you resist, persists.” Are you really saying that we should not resist an attack – a rape, for instance – should we just give up all resistance and just lie down and be taken?

Let me explain. When you resist certain feelings, they will repeat themselves. When you resist being with certain people, they will pop up to meet you everywhere – because: those people whom you resist, represent certain aspects of your psyche that you still have not learned to accept. You have judged and condemned these traits within, you have disowned them. Your resistance toward these people is manifesting as disgust, anger and hatred – and since LOVE wants all to be loved, She sends you what you resist and hate, so you shall SEE it, accept that it is there, and send love into it.

 

The iceberg

What I share, I own. So I will share the dream that played out this early morning – that my daughter really would prefer me to be dead, except for Christmas…

This is MY perception of my daughter. Thank God it is not a true perception. It is the role I have projected on her – reflecting a false belief I have been clinging to as “me” :” It is dangerous to receive Love, I am not worthy.”

I woke up with this atomic strong urge – “YOU HAVE TO LOVE ME- YOU MUST LOVE ME’ “and it was easy to see that the very center of pain  came from the lungs and  the shield around the heart – with the chronic painful cough and the breath that is so constricted. The pain  felt like a full-blown heart attack  – a mammoth stepped on my chest, and I knew that if  I succumbed to that feeling, believing I was this body, I would be dead within 10 seconds.

But all parts of me did not accept that this was true: I am not a body, there is no death in Christ. I recognized the agonized crushed feeling was just a replay of the tremendous fear during the attack in the wood,* where I certainly knew that I was close to death -and I had made it mean that I was guilty and sinful and deserved it, when my mother did not comfort me and  listen to what I had experienced when I returned home from the wood. This is what the Holy Son of God believed at the perceived separation from God: I have sinned! I am guilty beyond any measure – and now He hates me – I am out of His favor and His love – for ever

Now, when the catastrophic feeling at last was allowed in its full measure, Life poured into the iron armor of holdings around the heart –  seeping into those muscle tensions that were created, when I projected my unwillingness to love myself, on my family – and later have projected outside on “enemies” to attack me

And so it is, in this world: attack, or be attacked

I thank Jesus for his Course in Miracles that allowed me to gradually change my mind and perception with its 365 lessons

I believe that the one reason that heart attack did not kill me, is that I recognized it as coming from a false thought: I am not worthy of love. Parts of me believed that strong enough to project a dream where my main mother projection, my daughter, said what I have projected her to say – so I could recognize my error in perception when I woke up and allow the armor around the heart to melt.

There is One Mind, and we are all it

The pains can have no effect on me if I stop believing in the false stories of the ego. Right now, the energies are working through my body as sunrays shining on an iceberg. The frozen structure answers with sensations – and if I believed in the stories about a separated me and guilt, the pain would be atrocious – as the first experience of heart pain when I awoke from my dream. As just witnessing right now in gratitude and wonder, pain is seen as springtime: the buds may be afraid of opening, but they will anyway

Again and again I notice that I stop breathing – and again and again Spirit gently prompts me to breathe into these old holdings in the body mind, allowing Love to penetrate them gently. He reminds me of Shem – the Love within the breath, the Life that breathes everything. I cannot exist without that life force: when I believe it, I am dreaming my dream.

Gentle breath after gentle breath, breathing itself into welcoming body mind.

The ego does its best to convince me to demonstrate complete awakening here and now – oh, hilarious

The ego further wants me to believe that I must be completely pain free to prove that I am  healed – but the ego IS the very thought system that things take time and “pains” should not be there.

Without the judgment, and the resistance it creates, I am just here – being lived with. And the parts of me that have believed in, and identified with those ego thoughts- those are the one coming up to the surface of the iceberg, asking to be gently looked at and released

Allowing healing is a choice – allowing the sun to melt it – is a choice. I choose to share this process because it is true and real, demonstrating what simply exists at the bottom of the iceberg -and allow it to be as it is*

(PS-I had to delete the photo of the Iceberg  for copyright reasons. Here’s a link to its site: notice the proportions –

https://www.google.no/search?q=ralph+clevenger+iceberg&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&gws_rd=cr&ei=Pl7wVe6_FMWfsAGIrKeoBg

What is Real was always here and will never change. My body will respond to the in-pouring of Love, and every second of the healing process is precious.

I write this down for ME: I need to remember this place I am right now – when the spell of the ego seems to be stronger than truth, where I still prefer, as the collective unconscious, to dream up impossible dreams of separation.

Blue is playing ( long time ago)

Lesson today in A Course in Miracles: “I am not a body. I am free.”

In the evening, I am looking at “Joan of Arcadia” on TV. Joan’s class is performing a play. Their finale-song goes: “We are not flesh and blood. We are love!”

*This episode has a whole chapter in “When Fear Comes Home to Love – a chapter that also demonstrates that the Divine, in whatever form we can accept, is present always – and can be called upon later – like NOW – to transform the dark energies in the cell memory.

Transformation

I want to share a piece from Sarita’s web cast last month I asked about communicating with an inner image , if that was not “making it real,” and she answered:

My understanding of making it real is saying that it is the cause of our experience. But when we acknowledge something in this way, (meaning communicating with inner images,) we acknowledge it as an effect that we have created. However, we are here to embrace creations – Jeshua says in Way of Mastery that we can’t transcend what we haven’t embraced, so we come to rest back in the Noticer so we can see and hold the enfolding, the respect, the allowance – the love, cause that’s what respect and allowance is -allow something to unfold itself – a love that IT IS – that is when genuine transcendence happens. So far from making it real, we’re seeing through the surface of appearance of something with power over us, or something we need to resist, or being made to feel a certain way by. We can stay a whole day in resistance to that pain in our shoulders – and in that way making it real. While when we bring curiosity, innocence and presence to it – then we are the Holder and the Unfolder of it. -If you have something in you looking like a wood-creature( I had just shared this with her) beautiful – this is one of your “lost sheep” simply awaiting your curiosity, your holding space for gentle inquiry, your nonjudgmental “being with.” And that will allow that aspect of you to enfold from a way it was stuck in the past, continue to unfold and be with you, bringing more of yourself into the journey of being Christ – you enfold these aspects of yourself.

After having listened to this again in my recorder, this happened:

I found – and SAW – my main resistance or guardian in my bodymind. I recognized that he was camping right next to a suffering part – and that he was, in fact, established as my defense creation next to each suffering part – as I guess it is, in the split mind we all share.

I have constructed, projected and created him to say NO to Light -which he thinks is deadly – confusing it with his image of a vengeful wrathful god.

I gave him a loving Space and just waited

This time, truly wanting to BE with, not wanting to fix

I became aware of how excruciatingly much energy it takes to keep this defense-pattern up – and I became aware of how much energy I have given this pattern throughout centuries – and how it has gone on automatic in humanity – fleeing from pain, seeking pleasure

*

Then, from one second to the next:

it is not there

Only unfathomable Light is there

I tune into it, and see that it realizes that it – the guardian-part – is not needed – just mind guarding against its inherent essence of Being and Beauty

The phone/landline/ rings

I run to pick it up, and catch it just as a female automatic message voice says its last word:

GoodBye

*

Not only is it hilarious – truly one of Blue’s most beautiful playful synchronistic pointers to me* – I also understand how effective it is for me to say GOODBYE to stuff I let go of: it establishes me as the chooser to let go – it is active

*

In “When Fear Comes Home to Love”, I have spiced the text with numerous examples of Blue’s playful synchronicities in my daily life – helping me to “not take it so serious”

 

 

There is no death. The Son of God is Free

Had a lot of resistance yesterday. Noticed it while it happened – judged it – yuck. Dreams with failing connection to taxis that should bring me home

Let me remember that I am Home, and that ego/me cannot come Home

Session with Kit yesterday:

We find out how vital it is to NOT come too late to our session: not let “anything else” prevent us from meeting up, fresh, rested, prepared. I notice that I often go to my mail right before we start – I think I have to deal with it before our session to save time, “I’ll only…” I tell myself – bullshit – oh the pain right under the Crown Chakra when I believe this stress-thought. I actually seem to believe it is VERY important to get that mail done right then.

It is not important AT ALL. It is absurd

NO: I need to sit and breathe and be present, to honor my connection with glorious Kit and the glorious work we do together – and I prepare for it by just sitting and being.

Now ego is telling me that I use up too much space here with all these spaces and line-shifts – let me just realize that I have boundless space at my disposal.

I want to share with Peter how important for me it is to speak out – and how strong brakes there are on that. This is what I am going to do, Peter – that gives me grounding.

We are sharing stressed situations with clients – and exploring what happens when instead of sitting with it as it is NOW, we try to “deal” with it: it creates guilt, shame and judgments. We feel we are being painted into a corner when we do not have a solution. It creates desperation. “I don’t know any way out of this stuck place!” we say and try to DO something – but just recognizing the blind alley IS the way out – to stay there and WATCH IT. Kit sees an image now: some “green doors that seem to be good ones to go through – but they are pitfalls – you go through and you lose your footings.Then there is a feeling of burning under my feet if I stay – but that is a purification.I see how meaningful it is to just BE with the unsolved situation.”

Allow the “push to fix” to rest – allow the solution to come organically. It will come, when we don’t judge

Kit says: It is Heaven to BE with it – and Hell to try to fix it and be the one who fixes it.

I take a quick trip out of the room to tape a radio program. The first words I hear the announcer say, is: “ A journey through the Heavens – but also through pitch-black Hell.”

 

Today, 5.July -2014

I am working with this lesson 163 in the Course: Death is a thought which takes on many forms, often unrecognized. It may appear as sadness, fear, anxiety or doubt; as anger, faithlessness and lack of trust; concern for bodies, envy, and all forms in which the wish to be as you are not may come to tempt you. All such thoughts are but reflections of the worshipping of death as savior and as giver of release. A Course in Miracles; Lesson 163 – There is no death. The Son of God is Free

Death is the separation thought: that I CAN be without God.

I was listening to Lisa’s audio this morning on week 17 in our training program. I had strong pains in the left side of the body, realized that they were an impossibility in reality, that they were my creation from an identification with ego – and suddenly the mp3 player stopped transmitting sounds. I fiddled with it for a minute and remembered that this means that right now I need to do nothing: just BE with the resistance that is manifesting as this electronic block to listening. I recalled two days ago when both lawn movers died on me- the electricity worked, but not the machines. I realized the sign and just stopped trying to fix it.

Then I fell asleep and dreamed, and when I woke up, it felt important to remember it. I asked for help, relaxed and got nothing. I then listened to the now functioning mp3 player, and came to the place where it had zonked out: Lisa said “ the only appropriate reaction to a Son of God is appreciation.”

AH! Lightening! I realized that I had judged myself when it stopped – just as I had judged myself and the situation when my lawnmowers had stopped working.

Now I instantly approved of myself  -patted my shoulders, stroke my cheeks, talked loving to myself. And NOW I remembered the dream! I could not hear BLUE as long as I was angry at myself and judged myself – as long as I chose fear, Love is not available. The anger was invisible – as long as I identified with it.

The dream showed me in the common state of returning Home – and once again I had too much luggage, and I could not find it. I found only one small rucksack – WHITE – it contained a water bottle and another essential items on the journey: a small journal and pen. All was shining new.

(My old red rucksack is 55 years old, people – time for a new white one!)

Dream-Leelah did not understand that the new white rucksack IS hers. But I do. And there are delicate drawings in it: It points  me to do drawing again each day. I just finished yesterday a big art-project that has taken ½ year, and yesterday I received in my mailbox a book I ordered some months ago:

The awakened eye: A companion volume to The Zen of seeing, seeing/drawing as meditationby Frederick Franck(1979)

Excellent timing once again.

I will draw small things – details: snails. Straw. Grass. Flowers. Twigs. Seeds!

And now – connected to the Self with Joy and gratitude – does the pain seep out, seen as an impossible idea.

And it came back – and I know it is an impossibility from the Place I rest in – so it goes again. And then there is the thought “but what if -“and it returns – could it be clearer? It comes back because I just gave power to the belief of the possibility of “what if -.”

I created it by believing in its possibility.

ALL the power rest in me – what do I choose? What do I WANT TO choose?

The mind cannot oppose Truth and God, but it CAN pretend it is sleeping. Today I will observe where I go asleep – and chose again

Finding Quan Yin inside

The old pattern of “dark attacks” are escalating. And so also the help comes:-now the  Levines sent me another book about Quan Yin: The Goddess of 5th Avenue, a novel by Carol Simone. with a wonderful meditation on CD within it. I have played it twice already, and experienced being Quan Yin – which is the title of the first book that Stephen sent me!

All that happens is that a split-off part of the wrong mind has an idea that is unpleasant and it is a stinky idea and it hurts. It’s not serious and it has no power to take away the peace of the God mind.I am not my personal nature – I am That which shines through it.

THANK GOD the body is not equipped to process these strong energies. That makes it so much easier to see the body as the Course sees it: a false proof of a false thought of separation. The identity last night with Quan Yin was real, and all my aches and pains were gone while I did it. Now my work is truly to find all the places that I still carry grievances – write them down and allow this Light That We Are to shine through them.

Even if my body may die from this energy, no harm is done to the Truth that I am, and experienced yesterday

I accept my innocence and accept it in everyone

This is my experience:

When you say “yes” to fear, it does not mean that it is real and dangerous – it means only that you don’t resist that the presence of fear-energy seem to be here. You say absolute no to the stories inside the fear – the content of it. I am here as Presence – and I remember my Creator.I am One with my Self, a perfect reflection of God’s Perfection – and it is from This the yes comes: the fear comes from me choosing to believe in the separation thought, finding the made-up story about the separate me valuable ( more valuable that Reality). I now can forgive myself for dreaming this – and choosing again: I use the Quan Yin-ian cocoon in the meditation to take it in and transform it.

 “Trials are but lessons which you failed to learn presented once again, so where you made a faulty choice before you now can make a better one, and thus escape all pain which what you chose before has brought to you.”
-A Course in Miracles

And now: truly transparent art – Mitsuko Uchida plays Schumann: Gesänge der Fruhe, Opus 133

Blank pages – new start

I have all the nights, minus 1, since the stone was thrown, felt sucked into a huge magnetic field of terror/guilt/unhealthy energy where the same thoughts have kept circulating, and  have been bought into. I have believed them – and this belief has powered them and made them seem real.

Believing in the story about the victim-me has magnetized the post-traumatic stress-syndrome, inclusive depression.

This morning , after feeling the usual hellish feelings, and asking for help to see this differently, the thought descended: “This is just a story.You are not the hero of the story: you are observing it.”

In one second all the terror slipped off.

I was lying in bed and sensing how the “old identity” tried to insert itself. It certainly felt like something alien, but that was seen as a thought too – and I could choose to believe in it or not.

I chose not to.

Later in the day, I worked with Ashera again. We explored a huge resistance around the heart-area, and I “heard” threats: “You belong to me. I owe you, I am the powerful, and you are nothing.”

I have most of my life heard this voice – and I have mistaken it for something alien,“outside” of me. But this was discovered to be a “protector” from my own mind, whose function it was to scare me witless, so I never went near the original doom and terror-feelings in the center of the heart at a time where I was not mature enough to release them.

As Ashera talked, it became clear that the former “threatener”-function/voice willingly gave up its protector-role, as soon as I had accepted its function as original positive – the threatening was scaring me away from possible overwhelm and psychosis/suicide. Now, being seen with Love, it transformed into a warm loving light around the heart.

It was discovered that I had a contract/vow of taking on a savior-role, helping as many as possible. I released that gladly  – and asking Holy Spirit to correct it, was shown that the only thing to do, was to forgive the very idea of suffering and responsibilities and Bodhisattvas ( and specialness-)

I am here to know Who I am

*

And finally I want to share a wonderful method of healing taken from “Energetic boundaries” by Cyndi Dale. Here with a little adjustment to the Course-thinking:

1) Affirm that you/A/ are as God created you: free, healed, whole and innocent, with the power of God in your mind. Breathe into your heart while saying this affirmation. Sense the shift in your energies as you do this.

2) Affirm that the other person /B/are the same: s/he is not their behavior, but Spirit with the power of God in their mind and heart. Affirm their original essence.

3) Sense the Presence of the Spirit inside of B: Join with, link with, engage with this Spirit in the other –  feel how the unhealthy connections release and sense how only Love remains.

This can also be done between you and group of people – dead or alive – like family, workplace, community – and also an animal.

4) Call upon assistance of the Divine: The Holy Spirit/ God/Love/ All that is – whatever name you feel is appropriate. It immediately shifts the situation into whatever it’s supposed to be, by providing you with any necessary insights, protection, healing or act of grace.

*

What a wonderful helpful gift: to truly KNOW that any resistance – how vicious  it may sound and feel – is just a form of protection, and earlier decision made from fear – but with the intent to protect this “you” we thought we were.

 

 

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Please note that nothing written here is intended as medical advice. Readers who think that they need help with a physical or psychological condition are advised to seek a qualified opinion.

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