FRIENDS

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/w1blbHP2dZc

You don’t need more friends – says the monk.Thank God I have the bestest friends 🙂

A Blessing of Light

Each of us
is the way Being shines forth.

She looks out through our eyes,
listens through our ears,
and shines within our hearts,
helping us yearn for the unity
that is always Ours.

Nothing will ever be enough,
except what we are:
the I AM of Love,
witnessing and being Herself.

***

This is borrowed from Unlearning Insight

The Companion ( Norwegian folk-tale)

I am republishing this for any possible new followers

In a dream, I met an actor that once played the leading role in a production my husband and I created 30 years ago. It was a dramatization of a Norwegian story tale: “The Companion.”
In the dream, the actor and I both attended a big convention, and he was interested in therapy, as he was plagued by something he ( I wrote “I”) had no conscious idea of.

In the dream,I told him I could show him what therapy could be before dinner. Then I got acquainted with a lady who seemed very nice – but who stuck like a leech when I told her she needed to leave when I was with the actor. She refused, I PUSHED her out, she came back etc. At least I SCREAMED at her, raging. SCARING HER

I could not find a way to demonstrate to the actor what therapy was. Instead I asked: “ Is there something with you and “wool?”

He looked at me and told me he lately had wanted to visit a big wool-factory in his vicinity – and I burst into crying.
“Why do I cry?” I asked. “I think I REALLY want to make something with wool” he said. “I just have not known HOW much -!” And he teared up.

I woke up and saw two things: I need to take my seer-ability seriously – and that THIS is what people need from me – my ability to see what their heart wants. And what stops it. And then use storytelling etc. to give the “stopping-parts” a role where we both give Spirit free reigns and the blockages become parts in the story. It is SO fun and healing!

I asked my Self what the second part in the dream  – the girl who wanted therapy and clung to me – wanted. I opened my own book randomly – When Fear Comes Home to Love – and found this in italics below.. While I read it through, I saw that the “girl was a part in me that has internalized CRAZY energies from my mother and father when she was very little –probably demonic energies – meaning complete raging insanity lying in the background of their communication.

The belief “I am wrong” creates a very recognizable yucky feeling: that’s what makes you want to act it out. Now feel it instead, and find all its intricate details, like an excited explorer: “…cold in the chest. Constriction around the heart. Feelings of loneliness. Fear of becoming abandoned….” It is quite possible that you will start to feel some of the characteristics of Child: “I feel like an outcast…stupid…ugly…” Just notice the thoughts, and go back to the bodily sensations.
The minute you relax your judgments about what you are feeling, and just let the feelings float in the heart, you will know without any doubt that you are not these feelings. You are the light-filled, loving space the feelings float in. This process – of just accepting the feelings without believing in them – takes time. Have mercy on yourself.
Within the illusion, demons are demons because they are hungry for something they are not getting. When they get it, they transform. It is up to us to deal with the ones we have created, unwittingly. We create them by ignoring and judging our painful feelings.

I then proceeded by offering a method from the Buddhist tradition called Chød*– to finally give the “demon” what they need – which in this little girl’s case was “BEING IN PERMANENT JOY.”

I saw again (seen it many times a before) that I had demonized this little girl’s feelings and needs – but now there were NO judgments at all around it – just “so.” She had seen it as her job to internalize others’ dark repressed energies – that felt safer than believing that THEY were dangerous.

Now I let those judgments go and felt deeply her terror and expressed it.

What I chased out, and judged as “obnoxious” and “clinging” was the very aspect of me who had KEPT the energy inside until now.

I sweat like crazy as I write this

*

For the ones interested in symbolism

The Companion  was a man in the fairytale “the Companion”who was frozen in  big block of ice after his death because he has not been put in “christian soil.” His “sin” had been to water the wine he sold – and WINE symbolizes Spirit. Watering wine means therefore mixing ego with spirit – “spiritualizing” it.

The main person – Johannes – paid him off and buried him – and now the former  Spirit-evader became Johannes’ Companion – helping him to marry the princess –  first freeing her from the Troll in the Mountain, and then purifying her in three baths of the  ugliness that she had acquired when she lived with the Troll.

THAT was what the actor symbolized in the dream 🙂

And we all play the leading role in our lives

*Chød: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ch%C3%B6d

Nu kan det sne

ET JULEDIKT

Jens Bjørneboe

To tusen år.

Og så igjen en natt.

Om noen timer er den atter feiret.

Og kornet som lå dødelig beleiret

av frost i jorden, kan igjen ta fatt

og gå mot vår.

To tusen år.

Hvor mange tusen netter

blev lys av helios til sverdsymboler,

til iskolde og drepende stiletter,

mens kornene i jorden selv blev soler

i telehårde, hjertefrosne sletter

– og gikk mot vår?

Ja, gikk mot vår

alt mens en jordisk vinter

kun la sin isnende og hvite løgn

omkring de første, vinterlige døgn!

Før vinteren for alvor kan ta til,

blir frøet fylt av fin, æterisk ild.

Og går mot vår.

Å, du som bærer stjerner i det høye,

som myndig delte mellem land og hav,

og øst og vest! Som skilte nord og syd!

Du holder oss ved vintertid for øye

Det mektigste av bildene du gav,

og sier: Tyd!

Tyd stjerne, korn! Tyd sol og jord!

For alt er billed, alt er metafor!

Tyd syndefall!

Og fremfor alt: Tyd barn og stall!

To tusen år.

Og fødselsnatten, den er her og nu.

Selv er du jomfru, barn og tømmermann,

og hyrde, konge ifra Østerland.

Men vit at også Cæsar, det er du!

Og Kong Herodes.

Stallen hvor det godes

såkorn blev lagt ned,

var engang fylt av kongene fra øst.

Og dette syn var tømmermannens trøst.

For Josef så at barnet bragte fred.

Da Han gikk ut av stallen for å be,

kom stjerner og tok bolig i hans ord:

”Inatt fikk verdenstegnet skje!

Nu har det vendt seg i den mørke jord.

Nu kan det sne . . .”

I got this from Unlearning Insight

Putting Your Mind in its Place

We have not been given a mind
to use to figure out 
how to navigate our lives. 
That is not its role.

Its role is not to make decisions, 
to worry about the future,
or to be pissed at the past.
(Although it tries to do all of these.)

It is to be used as a practical tool
for basic tasks
when you call upon it.

Its highest service is in quieting itself
so it does not distract you
from listening and responding 
to intuitive direction
from the universal Order. 
You may need to gently 
help it learn how to do this
through gradually lengthening your meditations.

You can let it take you to the edge 
of its understanding,
and then ask it to pause.
Let it watch you
leap beyond it 
into the Unknown
as you surrender the moment to Grace.

It may not know what you are doing, 
but it will await your return 
and be there when you need it.
It just doesn’t need to run your life.
It has no compass.
(Bless its heart.)

Robert Burns

-I had a dream just now in the morning at 0700 about a famous now-living English poet- a world known poet -who would be reading his poems officially in a doctors office today –-I walked through a wood with difficult terrain, wet and big wet boulders, sleek, one could fall and break bones – but I climbed them and survived- When I got to the doctor’s office where the seminary was, I was too late – but I found some women sitting in a kind of poetic trance in the room where he had been -I think it was Robert Burns – the stillness and the atmosphere was a kind of awesomeness after he had left – there were no words to be said, he had said everything worth saying – just a stillness filled with the beauty of his past words PS I have a physical problem with dry mouth this last month – writing this brought the moisture back – I feel like I am close to death

The colored stick

• Ca 30 years ago, I traveled frequently between Oslo and different places in Switzerland to do my obligational trainings in Expressive Arts Therapy. In one of them, I met a man that I loved, and who loved me right back, It was a feeling of total trust and openness between us – skinless, it felt.

One evening we wandered around outside to find an object who called to us. I found a stick with a bend on the end, like a head.

Next day we started to color/embellish our objects. I painted in a trance that I very rarely have experienced – the color-combinations were new and filled with joy. And  while I was painting my stick,my new friend lay at my feet, crying his heart out – so much was released within us.. It was like I carried the joy for both of us, and he the grief.

The staff was a wonder. Everybody wanted to hold it. It was filled with joy. And when the week was over, I had to bring it through the Swiss customs . it was far too big to wrap.

And the Swiss custom persons, who always scared the sh*t out of me – like Nazi officers – were now transformed into playful puppies.  They asked to hold the staff, they were standing in a close circle, mumbling to each other, and then they asked me to give them the staff! I said absolutely no, and they suggested that I made a staff just for them and brought it with me the next time I went to Switzerland – couldn’t I do that?

Their transformations was absolute – from Nazis into playful children.

***

I brought the stick with me to a weekend workshop I held at another place. I placed it is a cupboard and went home.

Next day it was gone

FOUND

I once went to Heaven It was like here But I was OK with it all in a calm and sweet way There was kindness around it No sharp corners or muddy floods Lots of cats being silly Just being – In an discombobulated way Love was breathing fully No fear buttons Eyes calm The more I looked, The more I disappeared I don’t know where I went But I was found and hugged

FOUND

I once went to Heaven
It was like here
But I was OK with it all
in a calm and soft way
There was kindness around it
No sharp corners or muddy floods
Lots of cats being silly

Just being
In an discombobulated way

Love was breathing fully
No fearbuttons
Eyes calm
The more I looked,
The more I disappeared
I don’t know where I went
But I was found and hugged

Holy Day

When it all unraveled

I have been a therapist since 1988 – I am 81 year old this October – this is how long it took before the psyche and body was ready to open up for just THIS –without being re-traumatized.

Now came only a clear and lovely encounter with the inner child who cried sorely after the abusers and their insane sadism-energy had gone.

I have a deep respect for the strength of the human psyche – only now, when I am almost 80 years old, have I worked through and am strong and mature enough to meet this in a perfect undramatic way. And this has obviously been the goal of this soul all the time -with no drama, but wisdom, patience and care to open up for the experiences of the traumatized child.

I have opened up in a zillion ways before – but not with this deep calm, accept and gratefulness.

Now Jesu words come to me: it is accomplished

finished – accomplished – done.

with no drama at all –