The Know-it-all

Or, should we call him/her the Besserwisser, the Lecturer.

Yesterday I had a serious case of being besserwissed.(Ha, the word-corrector suggested blessed!:)) And it sure has turned out to be a blessing.

I asked a question to a teacher, and for over ten minutes he lectured and besserwissed and droned on, with great power and conviction. I felt: invisible – dropped – powerless- crushed –  intimidated – a stupid klutz. And angry.

I  subconsciously called that response out of him, so to at last see the pattern and heal it.

So this morning I went into the Observer mode of  the Spontaneous Transformation Technique: *** see below

Neutral, emphatic,patient, no agenda – just wanting to BE with this part that was lectured to. I told it I saw it ( it sat in my solar plexus): I am here. I am not going anywhere.I am in support of you.

There was a substantial relaxing response, showing me that this “part” had made the connection. It was no longer isolated and separated. And there is the first shift: awareness comes into this old pattern of victimhood: the one with no power, no voice.

So what was the advantage of that position? was my question – (I know that I can’t let go of anything that I think I am the victim of -) why did I need others to lecture me?

Simple. So that I could be the nonthreatening powerless one. The one who was not noticed, had no responsibility. The one who did not provoke status quo, the belief system/religion on the rulers – and who therefore was reasonable safe from being accused and burned at the stake or tortured by one of the zillion inventive was man has concocted.

I truly saw that this was  a CHOICE I had made: to shut down my true authentic voice and will. I have made that choice WITH the power that God has given us all – the one we have, being created in His/Her Image. So that choice to be powerless is mighty powerful!

So I had made my Universe, as Jennifer McLean teaches: we all made it from 1)the beliefs we made when small when we were hurt and traumatized – in my case: ” Life is dangerous if you talk back,if you say no. You are here to make others feel better.You do not count at all as YOU – you are a “wrong copy.”

And then life works like this: 2) we make our coping mechanisms to survive – based on these beliefs – and voila, this is our Universe now: I think/believe that I will not be respected – this is a “Universal Law” for me now, based on my beliefs based on my early experiences. And I will perceive the world THROUGH the filters that I put up – and people who enters my Universe will have no choice, they will turn up to disrespect me – until I  can forgive myself for these creations, and deeply honor and love the aspect of me who started this Universe.

When I encouraged that aspect of me to feel it all, there was tremendous fear from all the times this soul experienced torture – and most of all, all the times it spoke up and loved ones suffered the consequences of that. It’s all there, in the One Mind we all share – and what we all heal, seemingly on our own, we make available for us all to tap into and share.

These times, huge waves of awakening sweep over the planet – what was before tucked under, now comes up to confront us – (a reluctant thank you, Mr Trump!) – We can only heal what we allow ourselves to see, to forgive, to release. And my deep experience is that when I allow these old defense and protection-mechanisms to come up – to be seen, and HONORED for their way of protecting us from harm – then  my Universe mirrors THIS new view of me/my life/ back to me.

*** The Spontaneous Transformation Technique is a unique, therapeutic system of healing. You can read more under “Services.”

This is a healing way to deal with the energy that get trapped in our stories and traumas, and help it to unravel and transform, when it at last is looked at with love. This opens a space of great healing and allowing of what is – and from this space you can play and explore how you want your future to look – free from the old patterns.

1.session is free!

Trusting the Process

 

The Bodhisattvic vow

This post “The Bodhisattvic Vow” is from my book “When Fear Comes Home to Love.”

You may recognize yourself. If so, wonderful 🙂 AND I want to add something to the chapter today:

“If you  claim something for your”small”self – like healing-abilities, success and talents –  be certain to correct yourself  quickly and give all praise/success to Source/Self/God. Only when I remember “of myself only I do nothing” –  will I be free. Only then you will be able to allow all human pain to flow through you and then OUT of you. I talk from deep experience here: my ego has loved the praise I have received for the art and the healing that has come through me, and that I have chosen to give expression to. There is GREAT temptation for the spiritual ego to claim that for itself: “I” did that. I am so special!”

The truth is that all healing happens only when this “I” let go and simply allows expression to flow through.” The inner artist knows that – and still my ego can grab it, it happens quick as a lightening.

Lately I have watched myself as a hawk to stop it when it happens. The great reward of doing this is that then the collective pain can not stick to me – it simply flows through and out. I am no more a flypaper for others bad energies. And when I DO identify with it – “Oh it is ME they are talking about” -I attach to the pain and subconsciously think it belongs to me.

If you have comments to this, please post them (also) on the page where I present my books more fully – click on Q&A

https://leelahsaachi.wordpress.com/

*

Here it is:

The Bodhisattvic Vow

In Buddhist tradition there is a loving pledge to truth: the sacred vow of commitment called The Bodhisattvic Vow.

A Bodhisattva has pledged her/his life to the healing and benefit of all sentient beings, and refuses to leave this plane of existence until we all have awakened to our true nature.

The Bodhisattva, being awake, knows that pain is not destroying What and Who we really are, and will act as a vessel of transformation for others’ pain – carrying the burden, letting it into them, willingly.

In Buddhist tradition, by exploring suffering, letting into us and through us – the opposite of denying it – we attain awareness – pure beingness. We transcend matter by going deeply into it without resistance – we are filling the wounds with light. We may allow the pain, the hatred and the grief to move through us, witnessing it and allowing it. By bringing healing to the archetype of hatred and Fuckeat,* we find the sacred essence within: the longing for love.

But:

We only transform darkness by choosing to do so, consciously – and we can only do this when we often enough have experienced that we will not be destroyed and annihilated by the darkness – and that we are the Loving Space that the pain can float in.

This Space is the opposite of that which Bird* occupies: Bird wants to save others in order to avoid responsibility for her own darkness and pain. And this is said without any judgment at all: Bird does what she does as long as she perceives her fear to be stronger than her love and light of spirit.

The Bodhisattva knows that time and space are components of the mind, where only this NOW can really exist. In this NOW everything takes place, in this NOW all pain in all time can be touched and healed by merciful awareness.

The only healing way to meet darkness and “evil” is by loving it. That does not mean condoning it. You can only love it when you look at it with the eyes of your Self. You can only do this when fear is absent.

You discover that what you haven’t blessed and forgiven, you cannot let go of.

Bird has a psychological pain, belonging to the personality and ego: a wound that has to be recognized in order to be healed. The Bodhisattva deals with THE pain – humanity’s collective pain – letting it be released through herself, and recognizing this Self to be Spirit.

The fact that my therapist and supervisor, aside from being a specialist in psychology also is a practicing Buddhist and a wise and loving man with a big heart, made it possible to explore the karmic pattern which became visible during therapy. Three years into therapy he insisted that I must have given a Bodhisattvic Vow in a former incarnation.

Small mind flatly refused the idea at first – why would I want to take on other people’s suffering? I have more than enough with my own, thank you! Then my ego blew up like a balloon: “Wow – I must be really good and special.” But since the favorite game of my ego is to degrade itself, it did not let me keep the nice feeling of being more special than others. So, I put it out of my mind: “Omar, you are really far out there.” But Omar didn’t budge. Time and time again he pointed out: “There. That is part of the vow.” And slowly it crept into my consciousness that it was VAST MIND Who had made that decision – not my ego. Something in me relaxed tremendously and recognized it.

Some days later, I sat meditating in the morning. The air was clear and bright outside the window. A vast space opened within me and around me. I asked: “Is it really true that I have consented to use myself in this way, to the benefit of all?”

In this moment, a great expansion happened within. In tremendous speed did I expand and become Light. I hear my Heart answer: “YES. At last you know.” This YES floats through me and relaxes all tension. In this moment, as I accept my choice, there are no tensions and no resistance.

The Heart continues: “As long as you see yourself as a container, a vessel for darkness, it lightens. It is sacred work!”

As I truly accept that I have given the Vow, my energy-field changes. It feels like a lot of dust has been whirled up around me and now it sinks to the ground and leaves clear bright light and space around me.

And from now on I recognize the “old” Bodhisattvas among my patients. Nur is one of them. Here is a healing story from a session:

It is close to the end of the session. She is doing a dance. Suddenly she stops – the atmosphere changes. It feels sick and toxic. She exclaims:

“I see something… it is a valley. Oh, it is awful. Very bad. I feel sick.”

“Please examine it, tell me what you see. I sense that it would be a good idea to say: Whatever in me that is no longer serving the highest good for all, I choose to release to the One.”

She speaks with authority. “I see many American Indians… they are suffering… now they all melt together into an Indian woman… she grows old – becomes wrinkled – I see only her old head now – now her head shrinks! – Now she disappears into the light!”

Nur expresses how relieved she feels, and so is the atmosphere also: purified. Radiant.

I believe that this pain, this unhealed wound from the vast storehouse of human suffering, has now been healed through Nur – through her willing consent to serve its healing and hold its psychic content in her consciousness. What is needed is our willingness to let it pass through our heart, witnessing it and blessing it, surrendering it to the One Who cannot be divided.

© Leelah Saachi 2016 All rights reserved.

You may reblog this, provided you give links to this blog and credit the author

  • *Fuckeat and *Bird are two of the fear-archetypes I describe in When Fear Comes Home to Love. We unravel them to find their gifts, to see through their form to their sacred essence

Commitment

Sarita mentioned in the Way of Mastery-webcast Jeshua’s reminder of commitment to intention. That sank in. In the night, the inner Voice said “ drink water, go pee.” No way – I did not want to leave my warm bed and get all awake and sleepless. “Commitment.” Oh that. No. I want to be here for that inner suffering child, take care of her, keep her warm. Etc etc etc.

It seemed like hours went by before I decided to honor my commitment and not talk it away. I sat up, drank water, went to pee – and then the huge release started in the body. Giant yawns for a long time. Realizing the huge conditioning we all are subjected to when growing up – this is the “ME” we are taught to believe that we truly are. No wonder we defend it.

Went back to bed – and realized that my commitment has been to the ego, to keep the idea of the suffering me alive. And realizing that God never created sufferers – I did. God never created a false believer – I did.

I lay there, feeling like a drowning one floating up from deep murky waters in timeless eternity.

Then the “bad” feelings and sensations started. I remembered that I am in a “No complaining-week” – “this comes for your highest good, here are the jewels, sweetheart.” THANK YOU. Ideas flowed in, and insights:  I saw a shadow that looked demonic, and knew that it was just a costume – and that I was the costume designer. As my main official job has been in this life – I have worked in the Theater as Set and Costume and puppet-designer

Oh the humor of it!

So – I made these dark and hateful designs. They are MY creations.

The energy is now tremendously heavy and depressive/gloomy. And I know I can say THANK YOU, since I am in a transformational process where I  as Mind truly take responsibility for my creation.

Now I see a figure in a distance, slowly approaching me. It is my creation, made from the intense wish to separate and flee from guilt. A memory comes to me, from something I once read – about a man who met a wild boar in the wood, and immediately said inside: “ You are Spirit, made by God. I am Spirit, made by God. I declare that there never has been anything else between us than perfect Love.” And the boar stopped and retreated.

I also remembered words from A Course in Miracles that came to me on a journey where I met a particular nasty couple with small children on a train – they sat on the seats across  me, and the toddler kicked my legs. Hard. When I wondered if it was possible  for the mother to take him on her lap, she just looked at me as if I had insulted her gravely.

Then I heard this, from the Course: “Holy Son of God, give me your blessing.”

I became calm. And in no more than one minute, all changed. The father smiled at me and took the kicking kid on his lap. I got up and stood in the isle, looking out at the stunning nature. The mother did it too, we stood a bit a part. But she turned to me and smiled – such a happy smile. All the heaviness had slipped off her.

Maybe some of you read my post a couple of days ago, where I shared from Pierre Pradervand’s book “The Gentle Art of Blessing” –  about the gang in Rwanda that were out to kill a family, and how the father SAW their innocence and confirmed it inside throughout the time the killers were at his house – and how this transformed them.

In the night, I saw that THIS has been my soul’s desire – to have a life with lots of possibilities to see through the dark costume to the Christ inside.

This process started when I was a baby – and the professional part started about 28 years ago in an agonized demonized night where I asked God for help, and then pretended He answered me. I taped the conversations on my little dream-recorder. Later, when I played it back, I realized that the answers truly came from Source.

This was the start of the long process of writing my book “When Fear Comes Home to Love.” Here is a site where you may read more about it: with the help of Jeshua – and now –  it is so nice to see all the help I have received, in order to truly be able to ACCEPT what Pradervand’s friend KNEW: ““The Law of Love is present here, controls the situation and governs each and everyone.”

Looking at the figure symbolizing my creation, approaching me from far off, I know that this is not a snap transformation. But this time I trust fully that healing HAS happened – and that the appearances may continue in the world, but I will not take it so seriously any more: what people DO is not who they ARE.

I will add that I am a very good costume and set-designer 🙂 The State awarded me with a three-year scholarship, and I represented my country on an quadrennial international exhibition in stage and costume design. I can now smile a gigantic smile and recognize that this was the Universe’s symbols for me: my official job was in the theater,but as The Son of God I have costumed each and every “person” I meet to play the role I have chosen for them to play, so I can be helped to see the pattern and unravel it together with my faithful friends –  my family, friends, and all my patients in therapy. The symbolism of it says that I in fact costumed the world. LOL

And so do we all – says the Course

Now the masks are off, the players are wiping off the makeup, the costumes are giving to the dressers to clean to next performance – and the players are eating and drinking and just playing “themselves.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Transformation of childhood-house

Those who have followed me will know that I am very deep into symbols. Almost 50 years ago I discovered C.G Jung and his work on archetypes and the subconscious. His thought world felt so very natural to me – and I was intrigued with his way of seeing the house as  symbol for our body and mind – my body felt a strong response at that.

Yesterday I got a strong impulse to visit the place I lived for almost 24 years – from 6 till 30, when I married and moved to a new place with my husband.

I started to film from the moment I stood outside – and very soon I found the owner who invited me inside – so i could document the changes.

I am listing the changes here, and invite you to find what they would mean for yourself – if  you would like to play with symbols like this – like the weeping willow that now is removed. If this was your house now – what would the symbols mean?

The house looks shining new. The path to the entrance is delicate paved, the door is shining white and looks new. Same red color as when i lived there.

The weeping willow in the front has been removed 🙂

The roof is new. The windows are all new.

I find the female owner, she invites me in.

The outer entrance is isolated, no more freezing temperature there.

The inner entrance has lots of more space, and all is so CLEAN and looks so NEW. ALL is so well-tended and cared for.

What used to be the kitchen is now a storage room! And the biggest change: our old living-room is now their new kitchen – all in shining pure white! And they have added a whole spacious new  annex: a new  big living-room.

Oh that was a great symbol for me – this new living room added to the house!

Upstairs, my mother’s room and my room have now become one – just like my connection with my now deceased mother has healed completely.

Going down into the cellar/basement / the subconscious  – new bathroom where the food-storage-room used to be. New cozy cellar-room for hanging out-and a big new room added for guests/children – to sleep.

All symbols show transformation of unconsciousness and fear now turned into  spaces of friendliness and hospitality. Children are welcome here.

The false foundation

Jeshua, in Way of Mastery, points out to his students, that everyone of us has “signed up for this(whatever happens)” – and that the steps we are to take are already lined up for us. Meaning – I can trust that I am supported in whatever I seem to go through.

Now, I frequently seem to forget this – I am lost in an addiction to earlier insanity. That sounds insane, doesn’t it 🙂  But listen – here it is: there were some 20-25 years with psychotic episodes in my early life.

Disclaimer:And this is in no way meant as an instruction for others – this is just MY perception of what is healing for me. If you resonate, good, if not, please chuck it out the window.

In WOM, Jeshua’s deepening Course after A Course in Miracles, we are trained to befriend earlier energy fields that we before have identified with and denied/condemned – to open our arms to them, and recognize that we created them out of confusion and fear – and then believing that those levels of consciousness  constituted our true identity. Opening up to them, we discover that the “rules” we have lived by and have identified with “me” and “mine”, all rest on false ideas – for ex. the one I found today with Kit: the belief that what we feel is “too small” to be worthy of attention.  When that belief is given validity, the effects from it spread outwards and often turn  into attack on others, some kind of violence – all signs of that original false belief that what I have perceived as hurt is not “enough” to deserve comfort.

What a brutal attack this is on our Self. And yet, how innocent: it builds on a false idea, that society  supports us in adopting i: that we are not really worthy – that we need to be “reformed” in some way.

The energy from those psychotic episodes is now calling to arise and be forgiven – for me to simply BE with, bless, learning to see as neutral.

Last night I had forgotten that the energies coming up were a gift to be embraced – I thought I was under psychic attack again, and tried for my bare life to find something to do – “the right thing” that would heal the energies. But today I recognize, with Kit, that this is the addiction Jeshua is talking about: the addiction to this old identity as the insane/psychotic child and youth.  And: that to be addicted to something means that we try to support it and help it to stay the way it is – since we think this is US: this sufferer with this story is who I am.

Then of course our psyche does its very best to confirm this false belief – which is nothing else than a belief in a story built of false perception, built on what we told ourselves at that time of hurt.

THAT story forms our life – NOT the behavior from others, but what WE think it means about us -and therefore all the rules about what we deserve or not.

Talking to Kit now, my eyes and mind are opened and I recognize the insanity-energies as just earlier intensely condemned stuff  now coming up to be allowed and released. And a vital element is added: in order to be able to NOT be sucked into the old story again, and feed the energy with thoughts about how dreadful this is – I simply can, as Kit is suggesting, say: “What can I give myself now, when it hurts so much?”

Well – I can sit up in bed. Change my perception and position. I can drink water. I can pull a soft shawl around me. And so the situation that before was seen as “solution-searching from a frantic mind” now turns into simply being with: – witnessing, listening to the old story from the child, and staying in truth. This calls for TRUST in the situation: this is just a part of the path to awakening – and I decide if it will be horrible or healing.

So very simple. And how truly complicated we make it  by believing in the thoughts we told ourselves – the thoughts that were the foundation of the story of us.

 

 

Transformation

I write this blog because I am certain that what I explore and examine may benefit others. The root of pain – and how to relate to it with LOVE so it transforms – that is good stuff I think:) And today I want to share how old pain from generations back can be transferred to others. Us.

This night I again wanted to relate to the long-time source of pain in the chest-lung-area. When I cough now, it sounds like there is a huge echo-hall inside there.

So I thought – innocence! It needs innocence! And I “put” innocence in there – and it was not received. Super-strong resistance. And sitting with that, it became clear for me that of course GUILT cannot stand INNOCENCE.

Guilt calls for punishment – for perfection – CONTROL and clever pleasing behaviour. A Course in Miracles teaches that original guilt comes from the moment in the One Mind where the Son of God decided enter  the  experiment of separation – and arose in that indescribably horrible moment where we thought that God was now our adversary.

But God has not changed Her way on being unconditional eternal love, and I am still in my true nature as  He has created me

So -is it true that I am guilty?

I have certainly done a lot of hurtful thoughtless  behaviour in the separated state of mind. But am I guilty?

No – I still am as I always was and am – eternal, unharmed, all-loving. Aligning with this, I know I am innocent

So – The Course also teaches that I /my soul have chosen to experience everything I experience – included the pain in the chest.

How can I look at that differently now – with love and curiosity, instead of judgment?

I put a loving hand on my heart and close my eyes.

“Do you need something?”

It is Mother’s face I see there -( she died 40 years ago) right in the middle of the pain. And it is HER guilt I picked up, and it still nests there – begging me find all my grievances and let them go.

Now, with the Course practices, that relationship would have been quite different

And I saw that I needed to forgive myself for my creation of  all the stories of the world where love seems to be excluded. I chose to experience all of it, as soul, to find out how far away from God’s love I could come and STILL find Love.

Writing that now, I start to giggle – cause finding that out, from an extremely dark place, is what my book “When Fear Comes Home to Love” is all about.

Blue nudges me to open the book at random now.

Page 91: ( this is a description from a session with a man who just had got gout – and we found that it originated in my client’s grandfather, and his strong and fearful experience at his grandfather’s deathbed, when my client sensed that something “dark” was transferred from his grandfather to him. In the book, we explored how LOVE healed it all.)

“How did the pain come into being?”

“It started yesterday… it swelled, it is kind of an inflammation…. I have had this once before, and the doctor said it was gout… it is a bit embarrassing, gout is what older men may get In this moment I recognize and connect the energy to Eric’s grandfather. He died thirty years ago, but in Eric’s’ mind and soul his memory has still a strong effect, and carries with it a sense of horror that makes Eric split off a part of himself.

“Eric – when you speak about the pain in the foot, I get in touch with the energy from your grandfather. Could this pain have something to do with him?”

“I feel cold shivers down my spine!”

Shall we look closer into this?”

“Yes. I want that.”

*

Blue also points me to another place in my book – a reminder: ( this is written in 1992:)

The fact that my therapist and supervisor, aside from being a specialist in psychology also is a practicing Buddhist and a wise and loving man with a big heart, made it possible to explore the karmic pattern which became visible during therapy. Three years into therapy he insisted that I must have given a Bodhisattvic Vow in a former incarnation.

Small mind flatly refused the idea at first – why would I want to take on other people’s suffering? I have more than enough with my own, thank you! Then my ego blew up like a balloon: “Wow – I must be really good and special.” But since the favorite game of my ego is to degrade itself, it did not let me keep the nice feeling of being more special than others. So, I put it out of my mind: “Omar, you are really far out there.” But Omar didn’t budge. Time and time again he pointed out: “There. That is part of the vow.” And slowly it crept into my consciousness that it was VAST MIND Who had made that decision – not my ego. Something in me relaxed tremendously and recognized it.

Some days later, I sat meditating in the morning. The air was clear and bright outside the window. A vast space opened within me and around me. I asked: “Is it really true that I have consented to use myself in this way, to the benefit of all?”

In this moment, a great expansion happened within. In tremendous speed did I expand and become Light. I hear my Heart answer: “YES. At last you know.” This YES floats through me and relaxes all tension. In this moment, as I accept my choice, there are no tensions and no resistance.

The Heart continues: “As long as you see yourself as a container, a vessel for darkness, it lightens. It is sacred work!”

The radiance of our union

I don’t remember where I picked up these sentences – but they were seen as written in fire for me.

“I allow this ( situation,hurt,pain etc) to be transformed in the radiance of our union.”

Our  = The Divine and I. The Christ and I. Our true Nature and I. You know what is most holy for you.

I say that sentence and then surrender: I need do nothing – except give my willingness to join with my Self.

This morning. a tremendous fear energy engulfed me.It landed in my belly. A short second I mistook it for me and mine – then I remembered the sentence. A deep breathing took me over, great warmth poured into all cells, in short time it was gone and left was peace.

It has all come to be healed through me

Out-of-body

This is a first for me. It may have been the case all my life – but only now did it become clear. Well worth sharing for people interested in healing, energy, and the soul.

This morning I got this mail from Tapas Fleming*

It is about helping parts of the soul to reintegrate in the body. In psychology , dissociation is part of this – in shamanism, soul-loss is wider explained. For anyone interested in symptoms of soul-loss, just google it

I bought the video and listened to it. At one place, we are asked to have a conversation with those parts/one part- I heard a distinct voice saying “I don’t want to to come back to you.” Strong heart palpitations accompanied it. So I told it that i loved it and that I never would try to force it.

After seeing the video I was guided to use the Emotion Code -chart – and by dowsing I found the part – stuck in a feeling of helplessness. It seemed to be much older than THIS life – but also influenced by the sheer helplessness in this life. I asked it if it would feel safe and OK to receive a healing with Holy Spirit and a special magnet that I have, that I would move over the Governing Meridian which fuels the nervous system. It said yes.

After only moving the magnet the third time, the release of energy started – like standing in a shower of light. I sense it now too, writing this. It was followed by deep gratitude and peacefulness. Relaxation.

And my heart is at peace for now 🙂

*

Here is Tapas’ mail with links, for those who want to buy that  – as I see it  – very helpful video.

*

*Dear TAT Friend,

It’s been a total surprise to find out what a huge percentage of people are not fully in their body! How can you tell if you are not fully “in” your body? For some people, when they try a technique for personal transformation that seems to work for everyone else but doesn’t work for them, it’s a red flag that this could be the issue. Especially if pretty much every technique that works for others doesn’t work for them. It’s likely that person isn’t in their body fully.  

Here are some of the circumstances that foster this condition: car accidents, surgery, physical traumas, emotional traumas, sexual or physical abuse, being born into families where you are unwanted, being raised in families with alcohol, drug or other active addictions are happening, emotionally toxic work environments, and even prolonged periods of intense stress. A lot of times when situations like this occur, people actually energetically retreat from their bodies in self-defense. They just don’t come all the way back sometimes and may not be fully aware of it. They feel like, “Heck, no!  It’s not safe to be there!”

Things just don’t work right if a person’s not fully present in their body. It’s like trying to drive a car from sitting on top of the roof: no go. Physical illnesses can be much more persistent and it can be harder for you to shift from illness into healing. You can even feel mentally overwhelmed when you’re not fully in your body.

So I made a video for you that walks you through the process of fully settling into your body with the help of TAT. It’s super easy and I think you’ll like it!

If you’re partly in your body, it would be like being able to reach the steering wheel of the car by laying down on the roof of the car, but not being able to reach the gas pedal or the brakes. If you’re fully present in your body, you have full power to function much better and create the kind of life that makes you happy.

I think you’ll like this video because I’m talking into the camera, directly to you. My boyfriend said it’s like sitting down with me in a cafe and having a personal conversation.

Lots of love,

Tapas

 

 

 

Big shift

Recently, I had 3 whole days and nights where everything was noticed, accepted and letting go of – and everything simultaneously. There were no identification, no struggle or stress, no resistance – just being aware that this came through me to be surrendered. Then – after having trusted God/Self to take care of it, it felt like sinking back into all-loving arms, just noticing what went on in the body. And since there were no stories at all, there were no pain or suffering – just sensations, neutral, non-judged. The old suffering identity had disappeared.Then the old patterns sneaked back – and I remembered that these golden days HAD happened, and I was not willing to give up or fall back into old tracks. Today, it is much easier again. It is simply my trust that has grown. It seems like a big shift, but it might really have been a gradual process.

Then, this morning,I asked H.S how it would feel like if I truly let go of all tensions in the body – what would happen? What I experienced was many pains and sensations, some only a millisecond long- and after a while i feel asleep, and met David Bowie. He was dismantling a sort of time-machine,and I watched as he became younger, it was fun and we had a great time. Then he kissed me brotherly on the lips and took his machine, and I told him “Now I can tell people that David Bowie kissed me!”I felt very special and “chosen”, and he grinned and disappeared.

Lingering in my mind when i got up was an old feeling that I have explored lately – and I see is a collective one: a feeling of deep hopelessness and powerlessness. It had its center in my navel, and that gave me the idea that it was inherited by birth. The essence of it was “being taken for granted.” I wanted to practice The Emotion Code – a way to find trapped emotions in the bodymind -and many of those turn out to be inherited. Working with dowsing / a pendulum/ I found that it was from my mother’s ancestral line,  in 1941 – and it had to do with a shock that sent waves down in about 90 generations further down the line to me now, in 2016, now explored in this bodymind. I did the procedure with the magnet – the theory is that all traumas that are not solved and forgiven – or, as i found out, not DIGESTED fully – sit in our electromagnetic field/aura. Using the magnet I felt a good rush and release.

About it needing to be digested…I explored what we may have told ourselves ( WE meaning Jews at this point during the war – it was a massacre) – and there was a common strong belief saying “we must have deserved this” meaning we believed we were being punished, and that it was just. And this strong belief of not being worthy – a cornerstone of the ego thought-system – were being “explained” and justified to ourselves.It is this belied – HA, wonderful typo for belief – that I needed to sit with and sense in the body.

Before me on the table was The Way of The Servant by Jayem. I opened it randomly and read “the radiance of our union.” And I said out loud, ” I allow this old wound of being taken for granted with no value to be outshined by the radiance of our Union.”

Just as I had done for those three days – allowing
Christ to do it FOR me /through me / as me.

I suggest that a lot of stuff that is going on for people is inherited, and that we are the ones who have decided to allow it to be transformed through us.

If you are interested in The Emotion Code, you can find free charts on the web, and there are ways to learn muscle testing or dowsing at YouTube.

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Please note that nothing written here is intended as medical advice. Readers who think that they need help with a physical or psychological condition are advised to seek a qualified opinion.

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