Blue is playing

As I was prompted to by St.Germain, I will post some “Blue is playing” here – “When Fear Comes Home to Love” is full of them. I am absolutely certain that if they would not have happened to me, I would have died from seriousness and belief in a very scary God

Now I know better: S/he is utterly playful

Blue is playing: take my hand / 1999

It is Easter. I am going to the mountains to ski with my daughter. We are going by train. I am sitting in a seat at the aisle, and I am reading one of Emmanuel’s books. He writes “Am I here? Yes I am here. Reach out your hand, it will be taken.” [1]

Oh Emmanuel! Please take my hand. I am in dire need to feel that there is someone there for me. Please please take it!

I put my left hand with my palm upwards on the arm –rest, and close my eyes. Twenty seconds pass. Children come dancing down the aisle. They are playing with their hands: it looks like a kind of dance, turning them upwards downwards upwards downwards in rhythm with their steps. In a split second, I notice that the smallest girl is going to put her little hand exactly in my palm when she passes me, and I instinctively withdraw it. It’s not polite for strangers to touch hands.

When the children have passed, singing and dancing, I realize that someone just would have taken my hand – had I not snatched it away! A warmth rushes through me – of course, it was You – where else would You be, but here, as a playful child? And I realize that I was the one who withdrew and missed the opportunity!

Two days later, I lay in my hotel bed, napping after a long day of cross country skiing and sauna. I am alone in the room. I put out my hand again – may I trust that it will be taken?

Only ten seconds this time. The door opens, my daughter enters. She immediately sees my hand and puts a finger in my palm, like one does to a little baby. I close my hand around it.

[1]Emmanuel’s Book, p.72.A manual for living comfortably in the cosmos. Compiled by Pat Rodegast and Judith Stanton. Bantam (February 1, 1987)